Go Back   WAHM Forums - WAHM.com > >

Welcome to the WAHM Forums - WAHM.com.

Welcome to WAHM Forums

Already registered? Login above 

OR

To take advantage of all the site's features, become a member of the largest community of Work-At-Home Moms.

The advertising to the left will not show if you are a registered user.


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  #81 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2015, 05:26 PM
LindaKay's Avatar
WAHM Regular
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 82
Default

Yay! Another member of my fan club. I'm getting famous these days.
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #82 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2015, 07:03 PM
mixednuts's Avatar
Registered WAHM
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 4
Default About crazy dysfunctional parents

ssrr88, Most of us are 'victims of victims" as Louise Hay says. Her book You Can Heal Your Life helped me me through some rough times.

I know what it's like when parents switch the script on you all the time. It leaves you confused and frustrated and I think it is done to make you feel powerless. They don't know how to be empowering or they are afraid of empowering you because no one did it for them. If you reflect on, or get them talking about, how their parents treated them, you might gain some insight.

Last edited by mixednuts; 09-24-2015 at 07:15 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #83 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2015, 07:28 PM
ssrr88's Avatar
Super Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 365
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by mixednuts View Post
Most of us are 'victims of victims" as Louise Hay says. Her book You Can Heal Your Life helped me me through some rough times.

I know what it's like when parents switch the script on you all the time. It leaves you confused and frustrated and I think it is done to make you feel powerless. They don't know how to be empowering or they are afraid of empowering you because no one did it for them. If you reflect on, or get them talking about, how their parents treated them, you might gain some insight.
Thanks for the recommendation, but that won't work with my mother. To me, seeing her as a victim lets her off the hook, and I refuse to exculpate unrepentant abusers. I'm a huge believer in personal responsibility. I notice that some abusers love to play the victim card as a way to take advantage of others. She's one of them, like how she uses the company she worked for (and hated) as an excuse to mistreat me. Plus, she wasn't raised by her parents, but her grandmother because she and her half-siblings were orphans, and I was disgusted about what I learned about her, but she sees her as a saint. She will never say anything bad about her even though she died 25 years ago.

I will never do that. I've been hurt by her and bullied a lot in school, but I don't go around seeking scapegoats to take my pain out on, and blame them for not understanding me. Even if abused people can't change how their were raised in their home environments, it's up to them to stop the cycle as adults. One way I'm doing that is to remain childless because a child shouldn't have a mother who's still is unsure of herself at times, and it's a way of keeping my family from manipulating me through my son or daughter. Another way I'm healing is living well since that is the best "revenge".
Reply With Quote
  #84 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2015, 07:39 PM
mixednuts's Avatar
Registered WAHM
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 4
Default

I didn't mean you should put up with crap or not have boundaries. I just meant if you have some insight, it might help YOU.

But maybe not. It helped me. Everybody is different.
Reply With Quote
  #85 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2015, 05:36 AM
AG1976's Avatar
WAHM Fanatic
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Pennsylvania, United States
Posts: 1,748
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LindaKay View Post
Yay! Another member of my fan club. I'm getting famous these days.
I like you .
Reply With Quote
  #86 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2015, 03:14 PM
LindaKay's Avatar
WAHM Regular
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 82
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by AG1976 View Post
I like you .
Why thank you.
Reply With Quote
  #87 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2015, 02:55 AM
edward222's Avatar
WHAM Me You
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: I'm right behind you..
Posts: 63
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by AG1976 View Post
I like you .
Quote:
Originally Posted by LindaKay
Why thank you.
I can really feel that love is in the air.
Reply With Quote
 
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off