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Old 01-09-2019, 05:26 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 1
Default Unsupportive husband-help!

Hi, everyone!
I'll try to keep this as brief as possible, but I could almost write a book about this.
While I was pregnant with my daughter (now 2.5 years old), I knew that I would need to keep working for financial reasons. My husband was an elementary school teacher at the time, and there was no way we could make it on just his salary. I was planning to remain full-time at my job, but asked my boss for the flexibility to work from home two days a week. He agreed with that idea, and so I delivered my baby and enjoyed my maternity leave with the understanding that I would at least be able to work from home part of the time.
On my second day back at work, my boss told me that I would not be able to work from home whatsoever. He denied ever telling me that I could, and also lied to his boss about it, saying he had never given me permission to work from home.
This led to me eventually leaving that job for another similar position with a different organization where I am part-time at 19 hours a week, and I'm out of the house for basically one and a half days a week (the rest I do from home). It has been the perfect fit for me. For a part-time job, the pay is generous and I love what I do.
However, my husband still believes that I need to be working more (even though I actually make more income than he does, and he works full-time, although we have health insurance for our family through his job). He says this is because I have more time than he does to be making more money.
If I were to take on another job, it would absolutely have to be something I could do from home, that is flexible. I just feel bitter that he has this expectation of me. I don't think he sees being at home and taking care of our daughter and our home as work!! I take care of our daughter, do all the errands, cooking, cleaning, etc. AND have a part-time job outside the house. Now he expects me to do more, because "I have more time." !?!
I am just angry and I don't even know how to communicate with him about this anymore. Any tips??
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old 01-09-2019, 06:13 PM
ProBooksandTaxes's Avatar
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Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Denver, Colorado
Posts: 75

Uggg. I'm sorry you are in that position. I was too married to someone difficult for 20 years with 3 boys and it was neverending to make him understand. I left that marriage 10 years ago.

Would working more make more expenses like daycare? Transportation or gas?

Can he stay home with her once and see how hard it is to keep up with a 2 year old?

Is there an underlying reason that he seems to think that even a part-time SAH mom does nothing but sit on their butt all day?
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