posted July 26, 2001 06:00 PM
Yes, it was sarcasm, a dry-wit, and a sense of humor. You seem like an intelligent person to me certainly; not sure why you missed your own posts before, and just not sure I understand everything you brought up correctly. I can clarify it though.
Why does phone sex even exist? Same reason different religions do - people want it, like it, believe it, or need it. Their reasons are all different. Smoking comparisons again? You are using a speculative theory to validate another speculation. Too many conflicting and inaccurate reports or opinions about second hand smoke to make such a comparison.... sensible. BTW smoking can kill people.... phone sex doesn't, again verifying that the comparison is maybe a little too extreme for most people. I keep seeing that actually, phone sex compared to addictions, murder, illegal activities, and death... yet none of those things can be proven about phone sex, so they seem WAY out of proportion then. Phone sex can and DOES exist without the exchange of money anyway. But charging it as a service actually PROTECTS a marriage. The married man who calls will know that an actress will not invade his marriage like an online fling might, or a real live affair could. Seena already pointed out many reasons it is less harmful then an affair, and honestly the reasons are common sense.
Some people frankly LIKE smoking. That’s why they do it. They know it causes cancer -they LIKE it anyway. And some people.... dare I say it... don't give a heck if it bothers YOU or that you believe it is wrong. Smoking is again used as an interesting comparison.... but smoking is an addiction, and phone sex is NOT an automatic addiction (though I am sure that exists) or does it cause death. I find it so intriguing as all the comparisons to phone sex involve totally illegal activities such as murder/prostitution, or as addictions. Thought I would state it again for emphasis. Right or wrong, some things just ARE the way they are - whether we like them or not.
Thank you for being involved. We need both types of opinions... the pros and the cons. I just haven't seen any cons that are based on anything other than a person's religious morals and over the top speculation. And we haven’t seen them change at all either – the same group of people just keep stating them over again, as they have previously. Please provide us with examples of how phone sex indirectly hurts someone as you stated so eloquently that it does. Also, please help us to embrace HOW a mother doing this work might hurt a child, as you stated that it does. So many things can affect a child in a small way - the example you did provide us with was not a problem if the mother never informs the child of what she does or it could be caused by watching too much TV. Other things may lead to a child thinking pre-martial sex is ok. I just feel when you make a statement as direct as "it DOES harm children" then you might wanna explain how in more direct terms rather then speculating. The way you make your statement is an assumption, because some people do not believe premarital sex is wrong either.
It is a GIVEN that a mom will use her own personal morals to decide if she wants to do this work. No woman is foolish enough to jump into doing that type of work without thinking it over. I gotta make this point again. TALKING on the phone does not lead to a woman or her children doing anything in reality. An actress is an actress is an actress, and when you try to say any different - you are blowing it far out of proportion and giving it way more power then it really has. It's a JOB, a way to make money no less ethical then a MLM type of business. It is just a different type of business. Neither business is for everyone, and I have yet to see anyone making Pro phone sex statements say that it is. Actually what I see the phone actresses saying that you need to follow the law, you need to think it over carefully before you decide
The actress isn't "cheating by giving pleasure to someone else" lolol. REALLY now, she is talking... using her voice and nothing more. The CALLER gives the pleasure to HIMSELF....... and he is doing anyway since we know that all NORMAL men do it. Besides, are we going to blame Sarah Michelle Gellar for giving some guy pleasure.... if he happens to get a little frisky while watching her on TV? Teen age boys find some of the most common things arousing, including TV shows like Baywatch.
Or the SINGLE mom who has to make money.... who is she cheating on when she has no husband? What if the operator and the caller are single? Who gets hurt? What female image does your husband have in his mind when he does his private deed? How about when your father did it, or when your teenage son will or does? Can you explain to me how Julia Roberts is not a hooker? I saw her in a film once and she was pretty convincing. Is a MLM more moral? Tell us some other businesses a mom can do if she doesn't want to sell a product or has no skills to market to the public, where she can make as much money. I asked this before; can you provide us with an answer please?
For some people life is not a simple right and wrong. I feel that living in a black and white world boring and too difficult to live up to. Life is not easy for all men and women. Some people live in a very harsh lonely reality. Lots of callers are single men, students, and lonely. Probably many phone sex operators learn how to become counselors from their work AND what’s better is they can probably afford to go to school to study it! It is a JOB, not a career for many women. Maybe the mom taking calls will learn about people and be able to become a counselor!
It's just WORDS and words only have power from what YOU personally give to them. An example of what I mean might be that an African-American is comfortable with the "N" word among friends, but hearing it from a white person gives it a whole different meaning because we "white folks" used it as a very ugly word against their ancestors. But the "N" word loses its power when it is among an African-American and their friends, the meaning is not the same. It is WRONG for US to say it and but it does make it ok for THEM to say it, yes. The whole English language is full of words with double meanings. I am sure Seena can have a whole conversation during phone sex WITHOUT using one really dirty word. It's the IMPLICATION of the word that means something, that gives it power, and it depends on WHO is hearing it. The British (hi Seena) have swear words that mean nothing to someone from the states. It's cultural, and it depends on WHO is listening to the words, and how they want to interpret them. Take your question on my sarcasm for example... it was how YOU read it. Maybe it was just a joke
I can tell you this; statistics say teens are having sex at a higher rate then ever. AIDS is a massive risk as well as all STD's, and of course teens are unprepared for pregnancy. There is a difference between teaching my child morals, and knowing whether or not she is going to use them. IT IS her choice! She has her own life to live, I was just the vessel that brought her here. She may disagree with my morals when she gets older, so I will prepare her by educating her about EVERYTHING and that includes phone sex, drugs, smoking, murder, and all the things that happen in life. I will teach her the ways to protect herself from the ugliness in the world, because beyond what I do for a living (VA not an actress).... THAT is my real job. I read on the net that 86% of 19-year-old boys/young men have had sex...WOW. Phone sex is a lot safer and could LOWER that statistic. A 19-year-old boy can legally call a phone sex service; and maybe he is safer in the long run to do that. Really now if YOUR son is one of those 86% (and there is a darn good chance he will be) wouldn’t you rather he save the intercourse for marriage and masturbate listening to a woman’s voice? Heck, some people (like Clinton) feel that ONLY intercourse before marriage is wrong…. That oral sex doesn’t count! BUT you can still catch an STD through oral sex. Phone Sex is 100% safe sex. Now THAT IS AN ABSOLUTE!
Also wanted to point out that phone sex is not like being a stripper. There are no lap dances, its a simple enhancement to an already existing male sexual activity. It is discreet, the caller never sees the actress, she can tell him she is getting her rocks off too while she reads a Cosmo magazine. If fantasy outside of marriage is wrong, then all you lovely ladies will be very alone in a heaven with no men lol (yea a joke). Just curious, are you so perfectly holy that you have never had a sex dream about some other man other than you hubby? Dreams aren't controlled. I am a perfectly happy married woman, and my hubby is great (most of the time lol). Our life is not perfect but we are best friends and lovers. I have no desire to be with any other man, but gosh darn it.... Mel Gibson is one hot man, and my 10 second fantasy when I see him on TV or in a movie is totally normal and healthy. If you do not have fantasies then you may want to seek some medical advice because any doctor will tell you its abnormal not to.
Sorry to see you “walk away”. Please do stop by again when you have something new to add to the discussion! We will welcome your new ideas, new theories, and new view points.
quote:Originally posted by McPaige67: Is a MLM more moral? [B]B]
Those of you who don't like getting off on a tangent, just skip this paragraph It depends on the MLM, and this is not the place to discuss it in detail. Some are scams, some are not. For anyone who's interested, there's a link on the wahm.com home page and several other informative posts about MLM. There is the misconception that MLM = scam. I know of many that are not. Enough said about that.
As far as who is a single person cheating on, let me see if I can answer this one without anyone being offended by my beliefs. OK - not everybody agrees that premarital sex is wrong. It's kind of like eating a Big Mac at 4pm when a filet mignon is awaiting you at 5:30. That Big Mac may have seemed like a good idea at the time, but the filet mignon is not going to be as special as it would have been had you saved your appetite for it, instead of indulging in that Big Mac. Maybe you didn't know when or if the filet would arrive, but you knew dinner was probably coming, yet you cheated yourself out of fully enjoying it. Ok, maybe this analogy is a bit of a stretch to some of you, but I know you don't want to read my preaching. My belief is that whatever activity constitutes infidelity within a marriage also is infidelity on the part of a single person -committed against the future spouse.
posted July 26, 2001 09:11 PM
Hi Happy, good to see ya again ! Some people never plan to marry, so should they never have sex? Or how about the guy who doesn't find the right woman until he is 36? (btw I know this really great single guy who needs a good woman lol) Let's say he does want to remain a virgin until his wedding night. Is it realistic to say he won't ever masturbate? Or have a rich imagination and fantasies about women? What if calling phone sex HELPS him to refrain from having pre-marital sex becaue after 36 years he is a little tired of not having a woman? It's obvious when you view statistics that 86% of 19 year old boys are having sex - that they aren't waiting for marriage. Rather then just telling them its wrong to do, maybe give them another option..... ala phone sex. I have friends... a man of 40 who just lost his wife to an 8 year battle with cancer. She was so young, and they were a wonderful couple both being advocates in the fight against breast cancer - really good people. He is left with a 6 year old son to raise alone. Their story is long and beautiful with a sad ending. Maybe he will never want to marry again - he feels like he lost the soulmate God gave him. But surely he will get lonely for female company. Maybe he won't want to date in front of his grieving son. Maybe, calling a phone sex service would be good for him to do for a short time - there no relationship commitment to think about. But he can talk one on one with a woman and even release his sexual tensions. Maybe that's all he will need for the moment. Now this is just a senario, I have no clue how my friend feels about such a matter because it's not like it's something a man will openly discuss with his friends or his minister. But if he felt the need and desire to call a company, talk to woman, and do his private business... who am I to tell him to wait for another piece of steak?
There are lots of people who would prefer to eat that hamburger than a steak... and maybe even for their whole life. Some people never marry for personal reasons - there may never be a "future spouse". There is no absolute in life that everyone will marry or that every marriage will even last. It's like saying that every married couple HAS to have children, some prefer to be childless. I know you are trying to make a point and to stand firm on your principles which is great. But statistics show you are in the minority in your beliefs. Now again, let's ask the $100,000 question.... does that make it ok? I dunno - but that is the way things really are.
posted July 27, 2001 02:07 PM
Hello, McPaige. You have made some interesting points, as usual. Honestly, I'm not really sure where I stand on masturbation in and of itself. I have yet to find anything to convince me either way. Many people just can't wait for the steak, so they want a little "snack" so to say. When one involves a porno magazine or a phone sex operator, my opinion is they've crossed a line. I think it is perfectly reasonable to expect a person to wait until marriage for sex, although I have not always felt that way, and I know that not everyone agrees. Statistics don't necessarily mean a whole lot to me. I know the reality - I just don't agree with what the majority is doing. As far as giving them an alternative, what about not placing themselves in situations that make it easy to give in to temptation? Just my thoughts on it. I know that I personally maintained my virginity by not allowing myself to get into situations where I might give in to the temptation. Well, you asked if people who never plan to marry should refrain from sex. This is going to be another REAL popular answer (NOT!), but, yes, they should refrain. I KNOW about 90% of the population will likely disagree with that, but that's what I believe. >>Is it realistic to say he won't ever masturbate? Or have a rich imagination and fantasies about women?<< No. That's all there really is to say about that. I realize that I am most likely in the minority. That's fine with me. I've never been one to follow the crowd! I still don't think that because the majority does something, that makes it right. I have compassion for the people in situations such as you described, having lost a spouse, etc., but I have a different answer than giving in to fleshly desires. I better quit now before I start getting preachy. God bless!
posted July 27, 2001 04:38 PM
Jesus said "Let those who are without sin cast the first stone." MacPaige, Seena and happyathome all raise interesting points without being offensive, preachy, or casting stones.
Let me say first of all that I have never done phone sex and could never envision myself needing to do it, as I have an excellent career. Neither is it something I could ever feel happy or comfortable with personally, but I discovered a good friend of mine has it as a job for two evenings a week. Initially I was shocked, but she does not seem to have changed in any way for the worse; if anything she is more relaxed than when she was forever worrying about expenses. The bit extra she earns takes the pressure away. I asked her about it and she says it is just like acting, she goes into what she described as “another mind space” and then she laughed and said her husband came home early one evening while she was on a call. At first she was embarrassed but he sat there wide-eyed, all ears and when she put the phone down and logged off he burst out laughing and said that it was as good as going to the theatre; he could have believed, if he had closed his eyes, that he was listening to some drama on the radio.
What concerns me on this board is that there seems to be an eagerness on the part of some posters to equate sexuality itself – not even physical sexuality or acts, but even sexuality in the mind (outside of the most limited, proscribed and sanctioned physical expression) with sin. I don't care what anyone says, this is not scripturally-based. I'm not going to respond to every verse that has been quoted. We each read the Bible differently and while I believe in the infallibility of God and Jesus, I don't carry that same belief over to the writers of the Scriptures, the Gospels, and the epistles who wrote wonderfully, beautifully, and no doubt wrote faithfully, but they were human, just as we are. God inspired them, but they were not God. The Scriptures, and especially the Gospels (the most important part, since that's where Christ's teachings actually are), say little about sexuality of any sort, and most of what people do quote to condemn sexuality is either taken out of context (for instance - read all the story of Sodom and Gomorrah, and be very surprised!) or has been twisted through interpretation from the ancient texts. I don't have complete faith in the people who translated the original texts, either. For instance, none of the ancient languages in which the Bible was originally written even have words for sexuality as we mean it today. The laws in Leviticus have a historical context that few people are aware of, even while they are busy quoting them in order to variously condemn or justify the behaviour of themselves and others. Unless you obey all of the laws in Leviticus (eating pork or shellfish, wearing clothes of mixed fabrics, cutting your hair, etc.), and live in the same or a similar context, quoting the laws in Leviticus doesn't carry much weight with me. You'll notice, if you actually read the Bible as opposed to just picking out quotations from it that suit your particular purpose, that the sin Jesus admonished people the most for was not anything sexual. It was for lack of faith and for unkindness to other people. I have not noticed any of the phone sex operators here being unkind about anyone or about anyone else’s beliefs. I have instead read tolerance and an understanding for the frailties of the human race in what they have written, and a request for the same from others. “In my father’s house are many mansions”. Tolerance. Love. Understanding. There is room for all of us here on God’s good earth, as long as we cause no harm. If any of you can give me RATIONAL arguments or reasons why phone sex, used in a responsible, adult fashion, actually harms anyone – mentally or physically – and I mean rational argument, not quotations from a work of literature, which is what many people believe the Holy Bible to be, I would be glad to hear them. I am not entirely comfortable with my friend doing the work she does, but I am not entirely sure why, either. I cannot offer her any constructive suggestions as to other work she could do which would be as stress-free, disturb the home so little and pay her a fair hourly rate. She is physically handicapped following an accident, so finds working outside the home to be very difficult, especially in the area where we live being remote, sparsely populated and most of the available work agricultural and forestry. I really have no concrete reasons as to why phone sex should be any worse than any other “ordinary” job, or cause more disruption or harm to anyone. Obviously it would be “better” for my friend to -oh – make Lavender Sachets, or paint inspired watercolour landscapes. But would Lavender Sachets or watercolour landscapes, however inspired, help to pay the bills, and the heating, and the roof needs mending and the chooks escaped again and possums ate most of the fruit trees …? I think not. Twenty hours a week of phone sex, however, seems to go a long way towards helping with that sort of expense. Other suggestions would be most welcome.
posted July 27, 2001 07:58 PM
"Temptation" for a 36 years old man, or 26 year old man… may be the DATE itself. What if he goes out with a lady who is smart, pretty, spiritual, and he STILL gets turned on? It's not unhealthy or unheard of. It’s really not a matter of opinion, it’s BIOLOGICAL. So, say he acts like a gentleman the entire night because this is a new relationship and he has good wholesome morals. He goes home and he is a little frisky to keep himself from maybe making an unwelcomed inappropriate “move” on his date. Maybe he gets frisky with phone sex and if the date turns into a marriage he quits calling.
I know what your answer would be for my friend who lost his spouse lol J But it's not unnatural for him to long for female company after losing his wife. I know you agree. Maybe he will call a phone service 2 or 3 times and move on into doing the things that you feel are right. Like I said before too, that’s just a scenario lol. I don’t even think my guy friend is the type to call a line – but you NEVER really know what people do in privacy. Masturbation is a very private topic. I am sure he was doing it while his poor dear sweet wife was going through her Chemotherapy though, she would have been far too sick to engage in sex. Hmmm she was sick pretty bad for 8 YEARS…. They may not have been physical with each other for that whole time. What if she TOLD him to call a line… knowing how unfulfilled he would be sexually when she was unable to satisfy him herself. Maybe he was able to tell her the details and SHARE the experience with her – therefore giving them as a couple some form of intimacy. Again, just a theory.
I wonder how realistic it is to say that YOU would have never had sex if you hadn’t been married. Sex is a part of life – it’s like saying someone shouldn’t go to the bathroom. But using that theory… maybe those ARE the callers. The man who will be in a wheelchair his whole life might call. Maybe he will never have real sex… but he can call for phone sex and satisfy his desire for a woman. Obviously having sexual urges is normal, instinctual, and healthy!
Being open minded and not believing in absolutes is what it means to “not follow the crowd”. Rebels break rules – they don’t follow them lol. In the 1950’s your morality was king. However, as people became more educated, and as women began to be viewed as equals – people started to turn away from out of date thinking. The world has changed a lot, some for better and some for worse. But in the 50’s it was ok to spank your children… we didn’t know what date rape was so we ignored it….. we treated the mentally retarded as defects of nature/god and locked them away to mistreat and abuse them…. Women were not regarded as equals and so on. There was no time in history that life was as simplistic as you imply it should be. It’s so easy to say “things need to be a certain way” but it is not so simple to live that way for everyone, and we know that not everyone chooses it.
I can’t believe you said statistics do not mean a whole lot to you. Happy – I think you made that statement in haste without thinking it through. Basically what you just said is that scientific study that produces factual information isn’t important!!! It’s how we LEARN about a lot of problems.
And Laurie you are so totally right that our American Society is hung up about sex. Other countries are not nearly as extreme as we are here. It’s sad that an operator is looked down on in our society really. No one should be looked down on no matter what they do for a living or what their reasons are – cause we are all human beings with feelings. I agree that it depends on how the mom feels about doing the work and how her spouse (if she has one) feels about it.
That was an interesting reply and you make a very good point about considering the feelings of a partner. My friend's husband was a bit doubtful about it, but when he came home early (as I mentioned) and said he thought he was at Radio City or some such place, he became totally comfortable with her doing it. Some partners might not be, of course. My friend only logs on to the phone sex work when she is alone in the house. I am sure that, having been a nurse, you - like I(I am a physician)- have also seen more of humanity at its weakest and most vulnerable, hurting and clutching for comfort and companionship, than most people. This engenders a deep tolerance and respect for all types and fashions of people and a realisation that, whatever our personal beliefs may be, another person's way of life, given that they are an adult in sound mind and independent in decision, however much we might disagree with it(abiding by the law is a "given" of course) is what is best for THEM and we have no authority - not even "god-given" as some of us Christians may think - to try and alter that person's beliefs by catechism or preaching. The example of how we live our own lives should be a powerful lesson enough. SHOULD be, but very often isn't! We are, after all, human. Your idea of a sliding scale dependent on income is a novel one - but not one that I see the "Phone Sex Providers" or whatever they call themselves taking up! After all, can you but beefsteak for less just becasue you have a low income?! One lady's analogy of hamburger and filet mignon comes to mind here as being apt - I assume there are "phone sex services" available at different rates for different types of service. My friend said something to me about being paid more for different types of calls but I did not enquire into the details which I fear may strike me as a little unsavoury, or may make me laugh inordinately. Goodness me, what if I recognised a colleague from a description given to me in a discussion about such matters by my friend! No, I prefer to remain in happy ignorance as to the technicalities. But thank you again for your well-balanced response.
posted July 29, 2001 08:22 PM
Hi - I am Julie, very interesting reading everyones views on the topic! I personally am a FT college student and married mother of three. I am interested in a job as a phone actress. My husband does not mind and I am wanting to give it a try! I have been searching the internet for a couple weeks and not found exactly what I am looking for - I see some that some of you women that have posted are already in the biz and hope that you can take a couple moments to give me info on "GOOD" companies to go with :-) I have a good voice and am very motivated. I would prefer not having to get a second phoneline and still make good money. Please email me here: [email protected] I will make $20+/hour in 5 quarters when I am an RN but until then I need to make money at home while my kids go to school...Thanks Julie
quote:Originally posted by McPaige67: [BI can’t believe you said statistics do not mean a whole lot to you. Happy – I think you made that statement in haste without thinking it through. Basically what you just said is that scientific study that produces factual information isn’t important!!! It’s how we LEARN about a lot of problems. Being open minded and not believing in absolutes is what it means to “not follow the crowd”. Rebels break rules – they don’t follow them lol. In the 1950’s your morality was king. However, as people became more educated, and as women began to be viewed as equals – people started to turn away from out of date thinking. The world has changed a lot, some for better and some for worse. But in the 50’s it was ok to spank your children… we didn’t know what date rape was so we ignored it….. we treated the mentally retarded as defects of nature/god and locked them away to mistreat and abuse them…. Women were not regarded as equals and so on. There was no time in history that life was as simplistic as you imply it should be. It’s so easy to say “things need to be a certain way” but it is not so simple to live that way for everyone, and we know that not everyone chooses it.
[/B]
Made in haste or misinterpreted - either way, allow me to clarify. Certainly scientific study is important. All I am saying is that when it comes to behavior, it really doesn't matter to me whether a large percentage of the population thinks something is acceptable, or if they are actually engaging in something that I believe to be morally wrong. The simple fact that a majority of people are doing something doesn't make me consider it the right thing to do. Not following the crowd means, to me anyway, not blindly following the majority opinion. As far as education goes, I do hold a college degree (summa cum laude) I'm no dummy! (Nobody said I was, just trying to make a point.) I was raised by a feminist mother. My beliefs are not due to ignorance or lack of education. I believe what I believe because the studying I have done has convinced me the Bible is true, not "just" a great work of literature. And yes, I know, not everyone agrees. That's a given. Many things have changed for the better, but the mistreatment of women, children, and the handicapped cannot be blamed on Biblical morality. (Although spanking, which is not necessarily mistreatment, is scripturally sound as a part of discipline.) If one takes the time to truly understand Christianity, s/he will see many of the things we all value - love, tolerance, acceptance, kindness, helpfulness - are taught by Jesus. My point is, you can't blame the negative things on "my" morality, which is not quite so outdated as you might like to believe. You don't agree with me, along with many others, but many others do. Sorry to be off topic again - I felt the need to respond to these specific comments.
posted July 29, 2001 11:30 PM
Seems you might be taking everything I say now as an attack on Biblical morality. I was making personal statements about morality in general, proposing scenarios, presenting situations, and trying to provoke thought for ALL reading the board. No where in my post do I see where I said a word about the bible, and I know I didn't blame the bible for the handicapped or anything else. What I said was the in the 1950's simplistic morality was king, and yet things were not perfect then either. You are obviously taking things a little too personally. "I" frankly feel your opinions are out dated - however, you are allowed to believe whatever floats your boat. (btw the only reason I can even make that little judgment is because you keep posting in great detail about what you believe to be moral) Had you noticed I have never said MY religion? Wanna know why? It's irrelevant to the topic, nobody cares on this forum, and they need not be subjected to it either. Of all the things I posted - the part you felt compelled to respond to was again, about your religion. I believe what I believe from being educated and studying too... so what? Doesn't mean either of us are smarter than the other; it means we have had different experiences. Here is the situation Happy... did you have something further to add to the topic of phone sex work for moms, aside from the fact that you morally or religiously disagree? If you want to debate the bible or religious views that's fine - we can do that too, just not on this board. Why do you feel the need to respond to those particular comments so intensely? Did you feel your morality was being judged and attacked? If so, then maybe you have something in common with the phone sex operators who are posting too. Take a look at it from their side now, and while I believe you to have misunderstood my post - maybe somebody "upstairs" wanted you to see it and used this opportunity.
posted July 29, 2001 11:51 PM
By the way since my post was the one you responded to - I should also make another comment. You said your morality is not as outdated as I would "like" to believe. Remember though - I gave you facts. Statistics show differently when 86% of 19 years boys have had sex. Now that was not presented to you... to tell anyone to jump on the bandwagon, or to join the "crowd" as you are implying. I think you may have misunderstood. What I said was - hey - maybe phone sex could lower that number. It was a free form thought. I, too, happen to believe that 19 year old boys do not need to be having sex due to risk and health dangers, aside from the moral issues. I am not disagreeing with you. I just want to present them with an alternative rather than simply "just say no", because it obviously is not working. The U.S. is a Christian society, your religion Happy is the majority in America - it just isn't working if studies say the statistics are so high. If the opportunity exists for a 19 year old boy to call a phone sex service and it was aceptable morality, then perhaps my daughter will be a little safer.
posted July 30, 2001 02:12 PM
Well, perhaps I did take things a little too personally. I did not intend to "launch a counter attack," if you will. It seemed that your implication was that "my morality" is a result of lack of education. Perhaps I misunderstood? Anyway, that's what that was all about. And I do get a bit on the defensive side when I (correctly or incorrectly) interpret something as an attack on Christians. You have to admit there are many people who consider Christians intolerant due to lack of understanding. The teacher in me always wants to clarify things! Maybe another misunderstanding, but perhaps this sheds a little light on things? I am certainly aware of the number of teens having sex, and I think we agree that doesn't make it OK. It does mean there needs to be an alternative. What alternative, obviously, is where we disagree. Youth group - where kids are supported by other kids who also choose to wait; sports - where kids can be physically active and gain the self confidence to say no; parental involvement - parents have the ability and responsibility not only to teach right from wrong, but to instill a sense of self-worth in their children that will enable them to say no. There is not a magical solution, but I don't think phone sex is the answer. JMHO! I didn't review my last few posts, so I apologize for any redundancy. Now, I really don't think I have anything new to add to this conversation, so I think I'll disappear for a while. It's definitely been interesting, and educational! God Bless!
posted July 30, 2001 09:07 PM
Thanks for shedding light on things. However, again and I am being very honest with you - there couldn't be any attacks on Christianity on this messsage board if it wasn't brought up repeatedly. That's not a flame toward you, or anyone in particular - it's a statement from what I have read. I would never ever say that Christians (or any religion for that matter) were uneducated people. That would be me stating an absolute, and I don't believe in them.
I am sorry, but I personally do not feel that Youth groups, sports, and parental involvement will solve the teenage sex problem. I don't feel "phone sex" is the answer either.... it's the combination of all these things that may help. Different options for different people.
I am sure a good chunk of those 86% of 19 year old boys who are having sex had those options you mentioned and came from good homes. And the 14% that aren't having sex may not be trying to hang on to virginity either, maybe they just haven't had the opportunity. We all sure need to do more as a community, as women, and as moms. I just happen to believe that providing more options for every area (including their budding sexuality) will cover more of the battle. Sports etc just do not feel as good as sex does to a teen, especially when adults treat sex as such a taboo. Because it's considered "bad" - they just want to do it more, which is terrible really! Some teens are not lucky enough to be from good families, or commuities with youth groups - in fact I don't know of ANY youth groups where I am (such a shame too because it DOES help). The combination of things will work best, and it will STILL not solve the problem.
Sadly, my very own 16 year old neice who was raised in a very christian household and even attended a private christian school confessed to me she had sex - not with one boy but, several different ones several different times. I am the cool aunt ya know, she felt she could talk to about such a thing with me. I even asked her (I respect that SHE is christian too) if she knew she had "sinned" (I addressed it to her own beliefs because I don't consider it a sin - I just consider it wrong and stupid for a teen to be doing). She couldn't care less I am sorry to say. I was able to scare her more with the worry of AIDS and pregnancy, and other assorted STD's. She had never had a sex ed class in school about diseases or birth control, everything she does know is vague and it came from TV because the family doesn't feel she should know about those things. They believe just by her knowing that condoms exist she might become a tramp, when honestly - she has done that pretty well without them. I even told her if she wanted to act like a woman then she needed to go to the gynocologist like one too. THAT scare tactic worked, she went home to mommy and also confessed... begging to see a doctor out fear of disease. Now if we are lucky the fear of reality will keep her from doing it again, or at least make her more cautious. She will make her own choice. Everything else in her life is fine, she takes piano classes, been in the school play every year, was a cheerleader for awhile, has good grades, and even been on the soccer team. Now perhaps she could have been encouraged to engage in phone sex with her boyfriends instead. Of course they are within her age group etc. Does that make it ok? Again - I dunno, but she won't get pregnant over the phone, she won't catch AIDS over the phone, she won't catch other diseases, and only her own hand has touched her.
Some teens will NEVER say no to sex, and some of them come from darn good families too. Just for the record I never said phone sex was THE answer. I said it in passing - like hey why not? I have never said my morality was right and yours was wrong - I simply propsed an idea, a theory, and something to think about. As I have with ALL my posts. I could be very very wrong too, I know that - but I can not comdemn a job that some mothers do, based on my own imperfect judgement. All I can do is try to think, to understand, and leave my own fears behind.
Sports, youth groups, and parental involvement are all wonderful needed things in a child or teen's life, I just do not see how they will curb intense sexual desire. I do not see how sports and being physically active will cause a child to gain self confidence to say no to sex or anything else for that matter. Some kids are not athletically inclined and physical education is a nightmare to them, or some kids are handicapped and can not participate. It's much too big of a problem for us to solve on a message board. And maybe we are BOTH right. Your answers will be good to some people, and maybe mine are good to others. Being on opposite sides of the spectrum doesn't make either of us wrong, because "wrong" is way too absolute, and we are only imperfect human beings.
And Happy, I agree this forum has been very educational, and hopefully for everyone as much as it is yourself or for me. Cheryl was a genius to ask the question in the first place!
posted August 01, 2001 10:40 AM
Off topic, I know this is really not the subject of this thread, but I noticed, having finally found the time to read every single message on this thread, that there have been many statements and questions about whether or not “Jesus judges” or “Jesus does not judge” , and requests for the appropriate quote of Jesus (or the Lord) not being a judge … Here they are: (John 8:15, 12:47) Jesus said that he judges no one. (John 5:27,30, 8:26) Jesus claims to be the one that passes judgment Take your pick! Comments, please.
quote:Originally posted by wahmcheryl: Are there jobs a work-at-home mom just shouldn't do? If a WAHM is getting paid for phone sex while the kids are in school, is she harming anyone? Is she cheating on her husband?
What do you think?
A WAHM should not do anything that could endanger her family.If a WAHM is being paid for phone sex she could be endangering her childrens mental and emotional health .This country has a lot of hang ups when it comes to sex her children may be teased and this could make them feel badly or ashamed becuz eventually they will find out!!If you raise your children to understand that sex is a natural part of being human and that people with the hangups are the wierd ones that may help.I know that the phone sex lines are not just used by people with big appetites but by people with social and physical problems that prevent them from having a real relationship so I feel people that provide these services are actually in the helping profession. They are providing a service that is much needed I just wish someone would start one sliding scale for those on a fixed income.I know I would be jealous if my partner did that but its not cheating if they know.
quote:Originally posted by Lisabeth: Off topic, I know this is really not the subject of this thread, but I noticed, having finally found the time to read every single message on this thread, that there have been many statements and questions about whether or not “Jesus judges” or “Jesus does not judge” , and requests for the appropriate quote of Jesus (or the Lord) not being a judge … Here they are: (John 8:15, 12:47) Jesus said that he judges no one. (John 5:27,30, 8:26) Jesus claims to be the one that passes judgment Take your pick! Comments, please.
Dr Lisa
Ok, I will "take the bait." I looked up the verses you noted, and read them in context. This is really one of those situations in the Bible that gives people the, "I don't believe the Bible because it is so full of contradictions" ammunition. I will explain this apparent contradiction as best I can. I am not a Bible scholar, but this is how I see it. Jesus has the authority to judge, given to him by God. During his 33 years on earth, however, he was not sent to judge. He was sent as the Savior. The time of judgement is coming. This is not a "pick one" situation, but a matter of God's timing. John 12:47 &48 "As for the person whe hears my words but does not keep them, I do not judge him. For I did not come to judge the world, but to save it. There is a judge for the one who rejects me and does not accept my words; that very word which I spoke will condemn him at the last day." Now, IF you believe the Bible, if this does not convince you that Jesus will judge us, at the very least, it should demonstrate that God will.
[This message has been edited by Jewel (edited August 01, 2001).]
quote:Originally posted by countrygal: [QUOTE]Originally posted by wahmcheryl: [b]Are there jobs a work-at-home mom just shouldn't do? If a WAHM is getting paid for phone sex while the kids are in school, is she harming anyone? Is she cheating on her husband?
What do you think?
A WAHM should not do anything that could endanger her family.If a WAHM is being paid for phone sex she could be endangering her childrens mental and emotional health .This country has a lot of hang ups when it comes to sex her children may be teased and this could make them feel badly or ashamed becuz eventually they will find out!!If you raise your children to understand that sex is a natural part of being human and that people with the hangups are the wierd ones that may help.I know that the phone sex lines are not just used by people with big appetites but by people with social and physical problems that prevent them from having a real relationship so I feel people that provide these services are actually in the helping profession. They are providing a service that is much needed I just wish someone would start one sliding scale for those on a fixed income.I know I would be jealous if my partner did that but its not cheating if they know.[/B][/QUOTE]
Your child will are not be assured to find out. Like many work at home moms you can keep a separete office. From what I read - most ladies have to sign onto the system to even have the phone ring. About 5 years ago before i started my VA biz I worked for 2 weeks on a psychic line. The money was decent, it seemed easy enough etc. Wasn't for me though so I quit it. But I think of it as very similiar work. I don't bother my kids with my work and they aren't interested beyond a casual question. I notice Jewel sells educational toys, so of course her kids are involved which is cool. But my kids couldn't care less about my work.
If mommy works the night shift, how the heck are the kids even going to know specifically what she does? They'd only be teased IF the kids found out and ran around blabbing it to all their friends. I think my kids would be embarrassed of me working in McDonalds though wearing that ugly uniform lolol! Nah, you'd probably have more trouble with teachers and adults then kids. It's the adult who throw much bigger stones.
posted August 07, 2001 01:40 PM
"i have 2 arms 2 legs a very nice voice sd a smart very independent mind there for i can work. i can see going on welfare for peopel if it is a temp thing but not as a career move. excuse the typos it is late!!! love jillie"
[/B][/QUOTE] Jillie If you have a nice voice maybe you could try and find voiceover work for advertising agencies. They need people for radio and video voiceovers. Register with a legitimate (no upfront fees) talent agency. And make a demo tape to send out.This would allow you to use your God-given gift of a nice voice in a way that would honor him and I believe that when you do that he will bless you. Just a thought!
quote:Originally posted by Edie: "i have 2 arms 2 legs a very nice voice sd a smart very independent mind there for i can work. i can see going on welfare for peopel if it is a temp thing but not as a career move. excuse the typos it is late!!! love jillie"
Jillie If you have a nice voice maybe you could try and find voiceover work for advertising agencies. They need people for radio and video voiceovers. Register with a legitimate (no upfront fees) talent agency. And make a demo tape to send out.This would allow you to use your God-given gift of a nice voice in a way that would honor him and I believe that when you do that he will bless you. Just a thought!
[/B][/QUOTE] That sounds like a good idea to me! I wish I'd thought of it.
------------------ Your whole child is my whole business. Discovery Toys: Educational toys, books, games, software, and business opportunities. Get paid to play
posted August 07, 2001 05:11 PM
Professionals do voice over work, not housewives ot moms who work at home. The competition is fierce AND my butt there are no fees - there are always fees. You have to build a resume for it - not just have a pretty voice. You need an agent and a manager - just like an actor! There is serious training involved in doing voice over work. It will COST you to make a recording. You can't send in an audio tape you made at home - they want it in professional quality. Some cities do not have talent scouts or recording studios for such work - especially rural areas. While it is a good suggestion - it's hardly easy to do, and hardly requires no investment. It's also NOT a work at home job - that's a job you have to go into a recording studio to do. Meaning you need a babysitter etc, as well as being off topic of this whole website. Also it's a Job per Job type of work.... meaning you can't get a weekly reliable paycheck. You take work when it's offered... which might be 1 time per year!
BTW what if you are a voice over artist and are asked to do a commercial for a PHONE SEX LINE? Is that STILL using your god given talent then? Cause just what do you think many women who are voice over artists do commercials for anyway? lol Go do some actual research and you will find out that MANY phone fantasy operator do Voice Over Work and vice versa! Just a reality check ladies!
Ladies are looking for work at home jobs with no investment, no selling of a product, no MLM, no Pyramid schemes, no typing, no crafting, no auctions, and no scams. Some do not have skills to offer services, or the services they offer such as sewing already saturate their city. Some women don't want to bother their friends and family with recruiting or having parties. Some women do not want to sell a product. There aren't absolutes in working at home right? There are lots of options available. And whether you agree or not, morally or not, phone sex is one way she can earn money without the above mentioned situations. Let's allow the women who aren't interested in a religious debate the chance to learn if it is even an option to them.
posted August 09, 2001 03:23 AM
Hello, Like everyone else I have been following this topic....It seems to be a very reactive sensitive subject... Also, during the last 2 months I've been conducting a great deal of research...This research has brought me some extremely interesting facts...Now all I really ask is for everyone to try and keep a open mind to what is about to be said...If all these ladies really worked as a adult chat line person, why is it that no valid comapny names have been mentioned even once?Most of thes companies award employees with bonuses of $20 to $50 for one referral. The cash incentive alone would serve as proof of the actual situation.Hmm, this sure seems like easy free cash...This is merely a latye night observation....To keep the company names a secret would do a injustice to most of the present contractors.......
quote:Originally posted by McPaige67: Professionals do voice over work, not housewives ot moms who work at home. The competition is fierce AND my butt there are no fees - there are always fees. You have to build a resume for it - not just have a pretty voice. You need an agent and a manager - just like an actor! There is serious training involved in doing voice over work. It will COST you to make a recording. You can't send in an audio tape you made at home - they want it in professional quality. Some cities do not have talent scouts or recording studios for such work - especially rural areas. While it is a good suggestion - it's hardly easy to do, and hardly requires no investment. It's also NOT a work at home job - that's a job you have to go into a recording studio to do. Meaning you need a babysitter etc, as well as being off topic of this whole website. Also it's a Job per Job type of work.... meaning you can't get a weekly reliable paycheck. You take work when it's offered... which might be 1 time per year!
BTW what if you are a voice over artist and are asked to do a commercial for a PHONE SEX LINE? Is that STILL using your god given talent then? Cause just what do you think many women who are voice over artists do commercials for anyway? lol Go do some actual research and you will find out that MANY phone fantasy operator do Voice Over Work and vice versa! Just a reality check ladies!
Ladies are looking for work at home jobs with no investment, no selling of a product, no MLM, no Pyramid schemes, no typing, no crafting, no auctions, and no scams. Some do not have skills to offer services, or the services they offer such as sewing already saturate their city. Some women don't want to bother their friends and family with recruiting or having parties. Some women do not want to sell a product. There aren't absolutes in working at home right? There are lots of options available. And whether you agree or not, morally or not, phone sex is one way she can earn money without the above mentioned situations. Let's allow the women who aren't interested in a religious debate the chance to learn if it is even an option to them.
posted August 09, 2001 09:52 AM
Hi Kare do ya really wanna know why??? Cause the board wasn't meant for mentioning company names. Did you see the topic? We aren't supposed to promote that type of thing here. Go to the job boards and there IS a company mentioned and THATS the place to promote or recruit! We were here answering a question that the owner of the site posted. Besides don't you think that would show a lack of class on the operators part to sit here and try to recruit? Since it IS a sensitive moral topic.... can you imagine the impact of something like that? Some Christians may surely start a witch burning because several do not like the idea that we are even saying nice things about the job. All ya have to do is read the whole board and you will notice many things like that.
It's been a sensitive subject because some people can not understand or accept that others have a different set of morals than them. Some women here see things as a one way road to heaven. Others do not believe the same way. It's gone off topic too many times onto religion, which happens to be a very sensitive and personal subject to us all. That was the reason several ladies requested that it not be continually brought up. A specific person... Happyathome did want to learn and was able to respect the wishes of others. Did she learn something? Yes she did. Will it change her world view or morals? No, of course not. Happy is on her own path and that's just fine when she had the class to respect that we all have our own paths.
The company names aren't a secret. Operators just are not like a MLM. They aren't out to recruit their friends and families. It's a job and you get paid for the work you do.... not the work that other people do. Look at the whole atmosphere of this board over the last year! Operators are scared to post a "discussion" for fear of being jumped by the religious right.... do you really think they will post job info?? The enviroment hasn't been safe for them. So why would they offer anything? There are many different types of phone fantasy jobs and not all of them operate the same way. The line my friend works on is very different from Seenas. But nobody ever got the chance to explain the difference. We were all too busy fighting the religious war.
I loved it Kare when you said if "these women were REALLY working as adult chatline operators". I laughed for ten minutes at that one! No, they made it up totally! That sure seemed to be what you were implying! I think Seena had said she has been doing this for 15 years and the info that she did share made it pretty obvious that she did the job. But I guess you want her to prove herself even more, though I see no reason for her to do that for anyone. The phone operator doesn't make the majority of their income from recruiting... they make it from doing the actual calls. I was unaware that they now had to prove themselves at all. They offered info, that was it.
If you really want to know the truth about why a lot can't be said from the operators, or why they quit posting here - it's because some are attacking them with religion questions rather than work related one! They never had the chance to offer real info, they stay busy answering the Bible quotes and extreme comparisons of their work to murder, death, violence, prostitution, and etc.
I think it's a real shame. The opportunity is here for phone sex actresses to teach other women what their jobs are all about. Seems they are wrong no matter what they do! Now they are questioned for NOT posting the names of the companies! If they had then they would have been judged for that too. What's that all about?? I really think the underlying theme here is jealousy and fear. Why? I wish I could understand!
What I want to know is if you.. Kare, can manage to do research... why can't everyone else? Why is it they they everyone always expects the "work" to be handed to them? Then your theory of "free easy money" would be accurate! It's like ANY other type of job - ya have to go seek it out. If you wanted to sell Avon then you would go and find out yourself where and how to do it. Or you would talk to an Avon agent and find out. Why is this work suddenly so different?
Since it's a moral issue the idea of operators recruiting would be very very WRONG. It's up to each individual WOMAN to decide for herself FIRST. If you STILL feel it's such a deep secret... maybe ask yourself why. Maybe they do not like the way they have been treated here. Maybe they offer it in privately to women. Maybe they have concerns on how far the religious right will push them knowing WHERE they work! The sure have every reason to be afraid. Just sounds like you are making yet another judgement call. Maybe you aren't - but it sure came across that way.
The comment about this work being "free easy money" is a good one. So what if it is? Does the 10 bucks you earn selling Avon spend any better? Does it pay bills any better? Isn't that what every work at home opportunity trys to promote anyway? And especially MLM! Now the operators are being judged for the amount of work they do. I'd love to see someone judge a nurse for that. "oh all she does is change bed pans in an old age home, seems like easy money to me". How ridiculous! If it seems like its easy free money then maybe your 2 months of research wasn't as valuable as you thought.
All work has some value - sorry, there is no such thing as free easy money. You just get out of life and work from what you put into it... effort, time, engery etc. I happen to personally feel that MLM is free easy money. Getting paid for signing others up on on internet affliate programs is free easy money. I know some women will take my OPINION personally because thats what they do to earn money. But thats how the phone actresses feel too. Sorry, it is just so easy to sit back and make judgements.... isn't it? Even for me! Can't we just TRY to do something other than judge each other?
BTW an OWNER of an adult line DID post way back...... but she got attacked with the religious debate! Try creating a safe enviroment where the operators can post and maybe you would GET what YOU want out of the conversation.
Kare - why DIDN'T YOU ASK for companies rather than making an implication or an assumption? Post your email, and ask the operators to share their resumes/credentials with you.... so YOU can decide if they are REAL or not. lol
posted August 09, 2001 04:20 PM
Hello, Wow, I guess that I certianly deserved that great come back....In all reality I have worked as a adult chat line operator..Evidently my thoughts were expressed incorrectly...... The position requires a great deal of creativity and a strong life force...As for me, I worked 3 years while getting a degree..I still thank God for the opportunity that the job presented me.. However, I have also heard of numerous companies that rip hard working contractors off completely.....Lets say working 70 hours of talk time and never recieving the settlement check...As females , we all need to band together to keep this type of scam from occurring to more of our sisters..If we do not watch out for us ---Who will?
Peace and Love to All
quote:Originally posted by McPaige67: Hi Kare do ya really wanna know why??? Cause the board wasn't meant for mentioning company names. Did you see the topic? We aren't supposed to promote that type of thing here. Go to the job boards and there IS a company mentioned and THATS the place to promote or recruit! We were here answering a question that the owner of the site posted. Besides don't you think that would show a lack of class on the operators part to sit here and try to recruit? Since it IS a sensitive moral topic.... can you imagine the impact of something like that? Some Christians may surely start a witch burning because several do not like the idea that we are even saying nice things about the job. All ya have to do is read the whole board and you will notice many things like that.
It's been a sensitive subject because some people can not understand or accept that others have a different set of morals than them. Some women here see things as a one way road to heaven. Others do not believe the same way. It's gone off topic too many times onto religion, which happens to be a very sensitive and personal subject to us all. That was the reason several ladies requested that it not be continually brought up. A specific person... Happyathome did want to learn and was able to respect the wishes of others. Did she learn something? Yes she did. Will it change her world view or morals? No, of course not. Happy is on her own path and that's just fine when she had the class to respect that we all have our own paths.
The company names aren't a secret. Operators just are not like a MLM. They aren't out to recruit their friends and families. It's a job and you get paid for the work you do.... not the work that other people do. Look at the whole atmosphere of this board over the last year! Operators are scared to post a "discussion" for fear of being jumped by the religious right.... do you really think they will post job info?? The enviroment hasn't been safe for them. So why would they offer anything? There are many different types of phone fantasy jobs and not all of them operate the same way. The line my friend works on is very different from Seenas. But nobody ever got the chance to explain the difference. We were all too busy fighting the religious war.
I loved it Kare when you said if "these women were REALLY working as adult chatline operators". I laughed for ten minutes at that one! No, they made it up totally! That sure seemed to be what you were implying! I think Seena had said she has been doing this for 15 years and the info that she did share made it pretty obvious that she did the job. But I guess you want her to prove herself even more, though I see no reason for her to do that for anyone. The phone operator doesn't make the majority of their income from recruiting... they make it from doing the actual calls. I was unaware that they now had to prove themselves at all. They offered info, that was it.
If you really want to know the truth about why a lot can't be said from the operators, or why they quit posting here - it's because some are attacking them with religion questions rather than work related one! They never had the chance to offer real info, they stay busy answering the Bible quotes and extreme comparisons of their work to murder, death, violence, prostitution, and etc.
I think it's a real shame. The opportunity is here for phone sex actresses to teach other women what their jobs are all about. Seems they are wrong no matter what they do! Now they are questioned for NOT posting the names of the companies! If they had then they would have been judged for that too. What's that all about?? I really think the underlying theme here is jealousy and fear. Why? I wish I could understand!
What I want to know is if you.. Kare, can manage to do research... why can't everyone else? Why is it they they everyone always expects the "work" to be handed to them? Then your theory of "free easy money" would be accurate! It's like ANY other type of job - ya have to go seek it out. If you wanted to sell Avon then you would go and find out yourself where and how to do it. Or you would talk to an Avon agent and find out. Why is this work suddenly so different?
Since it's a moral issue the idea of operators recruiting would be very very WRONG. It's up to each individual WOMAN to decide for herself FIRST. If you STILL feel it's such a deep secret... maybe ask yourself why. Maybe they do not like the way they have been treated here. Maybe they offer it in privately to women. Maybe they have concerns on how far the religious right will push them knowing WHERE they work! The sure have every reason to be afraid. Just sounds like you are making yet another judgement call. Maybe you aren't - but it sure came across that way.
The comment about this work being "free easy money" is a good one. So what if it is? Does the 10 bucks you earn selling Avon spend any better? Does it pay bills any better? Isn't that what every work at home opportunity trys to promote anyway? And especially MLM! Now the operators are being judged for the amount of work they do. I'd love to see someone judge a nurse for that. "oh all she does is change bed pans in an old age home, seems like easy money to me". How ridiculous! If it seems like its easy free money then maybe your 2 months of research wasn't as valuable as you thought.
All work has some value - sorry, there is no such thing as free easy money. You just get out of life and work from what you put into it... effort, time, engery etc. I happen to personally feel that MLM is free easy money. Getting paid for signing others up on on internet affliate programs is free easy money. I know some women will take my OPINION personally because thats what they do to earn money. But thats how the phone actresses feel too. Sorry, it is just so easy to sit back and make judgements.... isn't it? Even for me! Can't we just TRY to do something other than judge each other?
BTW an OWNER of an adult line DID post way back...... but she got attacked with the religious debate! Try creating a safe enviroment where the operators can post and maybe you would GET what YOU want out of the conversation.
Kare - why DIDN'T YOU ASK for companies rather than making an implication or an assumption? Post your email, and ask the operators to share their resumes/credentials with you.... so YOU can decide if they are REAL or not. lol
posted August 09, 2001 09:45 PM
ANY company in ANY type of work that rips people off is bad of course. Phone sex & chat lines are no different. Why don't you share Kare about things to look out for? There are women here who crave the information and experienced ladies have the answers. Of course you are right there are scams in the business. Just like any other which bites the big one. You have to be smart and do research. Talk to the company but ask to talk to an actual operator thats been there awhile. Any honest company will let you. No one should jump right into any work without checking it out carefully. Lots of work at home things are scams, but not all. You just have to be smart and try to figure out the good from the bad.
There still hasn’t been anyone say how or why phone sex is not a suitable job for a WAHM … so I have to assume that, as no-one has come up with any ideas, that it is an OK job for a mom who does it in a careful and responsible way. As McPaige says so well, this is NOT the place to promote or recruit for it - look at the venom and name-calling which I received just by stating plainly what I do for my living and refusing to be ashamed of it! Kare, can I point out that I do not wish myself, my colleagues or my place of work to be victimised or damaged in any way; after some of the hatred-filled replies to my posts, I am hardly likely to give out names, locations and contact details on a public board such as this, even if it were reasonable to recruit workers here. I am sure that applies to all of us who own, operate or manage or work in the field of phone sex. Accusations of harlotry make me laugh – but at the same time, bearing in mind that in the States people have been shot dead for doing something legal which the religious right disapproves of (and DON’T lets get into a discussion here about that) – the accusations would make me very wary indeed if I were in the States. One thing I would add to McPaige’s wise summing up of how to check out a company’s credentials for ANY sort of home work – not just phone sex – and that is, if someone is looking for phone sex work, they should expect to speak with women during their enquiries. I would put any company where I spoke with a man during my job enquiries, or who was present during my training, in the “out” tray. Women should be your supervisors, your trainers and your direct managers. Others who have experience of the business in the States may disagree with me – but in my experience in Europe and Australia, a reputable company will not have males in direct contact with the female operators, whether they are on-site workers or home-based. It would be very interesting to share experiences with operators from different companies and different cultures – but perhaps not on this board!!! Just my two cents worth! Seena
posted August 10, 2001 07:00 PM
Kare - I manage phone sex workers in an Aussie company and my best homeworkers make Aus$40 -$50(gross) per logged-on hour; they are just not interested in $20 for a referral, and have all their friends and neighbours know what they do for a living! best wishes
posted August 11, 2001 03:57 AM
I have actually worked for phoneactress.com and the pay rate is about/roughly 14.00 an hour...The actrress is a independent contractor and must pay taxes and such out of the hourly talk time rate..To recieve the 14 range, one must answer 75 calls during a 1 week period and have a call average of 14 minutes...This is not a easy task seeing that there is not a minumum for purchased time.. Recieving calls is not a esy task..At any given time 400 ladies are logged on to the system..Time in between calls averages 30 minutes...Theorectically , one can be logged in for 8 hours and only get 1 hour of talk time...
QUOTE]Originally posted by seena: Kare - I manage phone sex workers in an Aussie company and my best homeworkers make Aus$40 -$50(gross) per logged-on hour; they are just not interested in $20 for a referral, and have all their friends and neighbours know what they do for a living! best wishes
posted August 11, 2001 08:58 AM
Hello Paige, This topic is wonderful and very intertaining......Your insight is fresh and honest. I took your advice and went to the job board and to my dismay found no offers for the adult lines....Thats really too bad because I would like more information regarding this great field..
quote:Originally posted by McPaige67: ANY company in ANY type of work that rips people off is bad of course. Phone sex & chat lines are no different. Why don't you share Kare about things to look out for? There are women here who crave the information and experienced ladies have the answers. Of course you are right there are scams in the business. Just like any other which bites the big one. You have to be smart and do research. Talk to the company but ask to talk to an actual operator thats been there awhile. Any honest company will let you. No one should jump right into any work without checking it out carefully. Lots of work at home things are scams, but not all. You just have to be smart and try to figure out the good from the bad.
posted August 11, 2001 09:24 AM
Paige, The only jobs listed on the board are for that terrible company caledd teleglobal services...tgs out of Anahein Ca...This company has several filed complaints listed at the Better B Burea..Surely, some where in the USA there has got to be a better comapny where a talented female can get paid what she is worth..Atleast a fairly decent check of atleast 500 a week take home would be appreciated...A 200 a week pre tax check is nothing and is worse than prostitution..Hit us with some facts... The ladies who are really making good money do not have any desire to share information with the rest of the community...From what I have heard some ladies make over a $1000 weekly...The comapny names are being kept under lock and key...HMMMM
quote:Originally posted by McPaige67: Hi Kare do ya really wanna know why??? Cause the board wasn't meant for mentioning company names. Did you see the topic? We aren't supposed to promote that type of thing here. Go to the job boards and there IS a company mentioned and THATS the place to promote or recruit! We were here answering a question that the owner of the site posted. Besides don't you think that would show a lack of class on the operators part to sit here and try to recruit? Since it IS a sensitive moral topic.... can you imagine the impact of something like that? Some Christians may surely start a witch burning because several do not like the idea that we are even saying nice things about the job. All ya have to do is read the whole board and you will notice many things like that.
It's been a sensitive subject because some people can not understand or accept that others have a different set of morals than them. Some women here see things as a one way road to heaven. Others do not believe the same way. It's gone off topic too many times onto religion, which happens to be a very sensitive and personal subject to us all. That was the reason several ladies requested that it not be continually brought up. A specific person... Happyathome did want to learn and was able to respect the wishes of others. Did she learn something? Yes she did. Will it change her world view or morals? No, of course not. Happy is on her own path and that's just fine when she had the class to respect that we all have our own paths.
The company names aren't a secret. Operators just are not like a MLM. They aren't out to recruit their friends and families. It's a job and you get paid for the work you do.... not the work that other people do. Look at the whole atmosphere of this board over the last year! Operators are scared to post a "discussion" for fear of being jumped by the religious right.... do you really think they will post job info?? The enviroment hasn't been safe for them. So why would they offer anything? There are many different types of phone fantasy jobs and not all of them operate the same way. The line my friend works on is very different from Seenas. But nobody ever got the chance to explain the difference. We were all too busy fighting the religious war.
I loved it Kare when you said if "these women were REALLY working as adult chatline operators". I laughed for ten minutes at that one! No, they made it up totally! That sure seemed to be what you were implying! I think Seena had said she has been doing this for 15 years and the info that she did share made it pretty obvious that she did the job. But I guess you want her to prove herself even more, though I see no reason for her to do that for anyone. The phone operator doesn't make the majority of their income from recruiting... they make it from doing the actual calls. I was unaware that they now had to prove themselves at all. They offered info, that was it.
If you really want to know the truth about why a lot can't be said from the operators, or why they quit posting here - it's because some are attacking them with religion questions rather than work related one! They never had the chance to offer real info, they stay busy answering the Bible quotes and extreme comparisons of their work to murder, death, violence, prostitution, and etc.
I think it's a real shame. The opportunity is here for phone sex actresses to teach other women what their jobs are all about. Seems they are wrong no matter what they do! Now they are questioned for NOT posting the names of the companies! If they had then they would have been judged for that too. What's that all about?? I really think the underlying theme here is jealousy and fear. Why? I wish I could understand!
What I want to know is if you.. Kare, can manage to do research... why can't everyone else? Why is it they they everyone always expects the "work" to be handed to them? Then your theory of "free easy money" would be accurate! It's like ANY other type of job - ya have to go seek it out. If you wanted to sell Avon then you would go and find out yourself where and how to do it. Or you would talk to an Avon agent and find out. Why is this work suddenly so different?
Since it's a moral issue the idea of operators recruiting would be very very WRONG. It's up to each individual WOMAN to decide for herself FIRST. If you STILL feel it's such a deep secret... maybe ask yourself why. Maybe they do not like the way they have been treated here. Maybe they offer it in privately to women. Maybe they have concerns on how far the religious right will push them knowing WHERE they work! The sure have every reason to be afraid. Just sounds like you are making yet another judgement call. Maybe you aren't - but it sure came across that way.
The comment about this work being "free easy money" is a good one. So what if it is? Does the 10 bucks you earn selling Avon spend any better? Does it pay bills any better? Isn't that what every work at home opportunity trys to promote anyway? And especially MLM! Now the operators are being judged for the amount of work they do. I'd love to see someone judge a nurse for that. "oh all she does is change bed pans in an old age home, seems like easy money to me". How ridiculous! If it seems like its easy free money then maybe your 2 months of research wasn't as valuable as you thought.
All work has some value - sorry, there is no such thing as free easy money. You just get out of life and work from what you put into it... effort, time, engery etc. I happen to personally feel that MLM is free easy money. Getting paid for signing others up on on internet affliate programs is free easy money. I know some women will take my OPINION personally because thats what they do to earn money. But thats how the phone actresses feel too. Sorry, it is just so easy to sit back and make judgements.... isn't it? Even for me! Can't we just TRY to do something other than judge each other?
BTW an OWNER of an adult line DID post way back...... but she got attacked with the religious debate! Try creating a safe enviroment where the operators can post and maybe you would GET what YOU want out of the conversation.
Kare - why DIDN'T YOU ASK for companies rather than making an implication or an assumption? Post your email, and ask the operators to share their resumes/credentials with you.... so YOU can decide if they are REAL or not. lol
quote:Originally posted by mmm: Paige, The only jobs listed on the board are for that terrible company caledd teleglobal services...tgs out of Anahein Ca...This company has several filed complaints listed at the Better B Burea..Surely, some where in the USA there has got to be a better comapny where a talented female can get paid what she is worth..Atleast a fairly decent check of atleast 500 a week take home would be appreciated...A 200 a week pre tax check is nothing and is worse than prostitution..Hit us with some facts... The ladies who are really making good money do not have any desire to share information with the rest of the community...From what I have heard some ladies make over a $1000 weekly...The comapny names are being kept under lock and key...HMMMM
Why can't you do research? Phone sex is a BILLION dollar industry. This site isn't the only place where you can find work. Use a search engine. Look for other forums. Check newsgroups. You have the whole internet in your hands.
This is not the only place in the world to look. You want to make good money.... so you have to go seek it out. It's not going to be handed to you or fall in your lap. The good opportunities have to be looked for, sought after, and then worked at. So that's the only job listed on this site. Go look for more. It's not EASY FREE MONEY - that means you have to go look for it.
posted August 11, 2001 09:28 PM
Can I just remind you ladies who are interested in phone sex work to look in places OTHER than the internet, too? Local or larger newspapers, even local radio ads, small ads on supermarket notice boards etc etc. I have used all these methods myself when advertising for staff. As a respectable honest employer I have learnt that I have to be a bit "coy" in my advertising and will word my ads in a local community newspaper under the classification "Part-time work" something like "Talk and get paid! Looking for work at home? If you're over 18, talkative with a pleasant voice and an open mind, contact me now. No selling, no set-up fee, no scams. ring xxxxxxx" or "Ladies! Telephone work at home for mature minded people; no start-up cost. Good per-minute rate, work as much or as little as you want. No outgoing calls. For more details call ...." I would imagine you have the same sort of ads in the States in your newpapers as we have in Australia and the UK. As in any sort of job where you are providing a service, it will take time to build up your skills and your client base. The ladies I have working for me who earn AUS$40-50 per hour are paid $1 per minute talk time, they get an average hold time of over 15 minutes per call. Most of them who get such a good rate of pay have been working for me for a considerable period of time and they have a core of regular callers who know when they will be logged on, and who call them almost exclusively. Most of them also do not log on for more than about 20 hours per week. My homeworkers start on a rate of 60c per minute talk time for a trial period of 4 weeks; they need to have an average hold time of minimum three minutes in order to remain in employment. I also employ ladies by the hour in the offices to do phone sex; they are paid $11 - $14 per hour with paid breaks, coffee, tea etc provided and Union representation. As McPaige says - get out there and look! Look everywhere! NOTHING but nothing falls into people's laps of its own accord. Sometimes I think I have been incredibly lucky getting to travel all over the world at my company's expense, to stay in the company directors luxury villa for free, etc etc BUT then my friends say to me "Seena, you work incredibly hard, you have good ideas, you are trustworthy and you are nice to have around. Is it surprising you've been successful?" If that description of me is true - then no, it's not surprising. I have worked hard to get here and I still work hard! I just didn't know I was quite so nice ... But you see my point I am sure - search, enquire, question. I am sure there ARE good companies to work for out there in the States, but they don't "blow their own trumpet" given the sort of work it is. Perhaps you ought to "watch this space" for further information ...
posted August 13, 2001 09:17 AM
When I first began my search for home employment that didn't ask for start up I too found the phone sex lines. I didn't try them because I was told that they didn't make as much money as I would make on the psychic lines. I now work on the psychic lines and I have never had any problems with them. I read in another post that someone had a bad experience with them, I think that depends on your manager. I currently work about 12 - 15 hours per week and I always get paid my $11 per hour (you are required to take a call on the 1st and 16th of the month if you do not you can lose up to $2 per hour this may have been the problem for the above worker). Best of all this is something i don't have to worry about my kids over hearing etc. I don't think that the phone sex is a bad thing, but it may not be the highest paying job either. Just a thought.
quote:Originally posted by sherriet: I don't see anything wrong with acting as a home job. If you have a room away from the kids or work while they're asleep, i don't see what the problem would be.
I don't see it as cheating. Giving a home number out or meeting clients outside of work would be.
posted August 13, 2001 07:13 PM
Steph, I had seriously considered working for a psychic hotline awhile back. My husband kept trying to talk me out of it by saying "There's no guarentee you'll even get any calls!", "You could sit up all night waiting for the phone to ring and get 2 calls!" and "You'll get all kinds of weirdo's calling you - who else is going to be making those kind of calls in the middle of the night!".
I would love to hear more about your experience. Do you have to work at night to make the money? Do you get a lot of weirdos calling you? Do you get enough calls to make it worth it? Where in your house do you work? I couldn't figure out where in my house I could work that the family wouldn't hear the phone ringing all night! Did you get a special phone line installed? Would you mind sharing who you work for??
I had, after all, heard that people make a lot more money who do phone sex, but that was out of the question.
I wonder how many WAHM's are successful at making a fair income doing the Psychic lines???
Thanks for any info you are willing to share, Shayna's Mom
posted August 13, 2001 09:13 PM
hi. let me tell u my experience. i worked for the psychic lines when they paid better ($15.00 per hour plus bonuses) I worked for several different companies, splitting my time each week between 3. some had good volume but others were slower but paid better. then low and behold these companies started to get sued left and right. the ads they do on tv are misleading. they started cutting pay for readers and increasing hold time up to 15 to 20 minutes. if you dont have good hold time then your priority drops and you get less calls. they started making you sell things like subscriptions to their magazines etc. many of the callers are on welfare. nice people, just didnt feel right keeping them paying $4.99 per min for 20 min to keep my average good. if you are not an excellent reader then those hold times are hard to do. you need tons of experience to really be good. most of those companies do not have the business like they used to. the internet stole it away. prn is now being investigated for hiring fake readers. they are also being sued over those cleo commercials. they constantly have lawsuits going on. my opinion is when prn goes under they will all close up shop slowly after. i started doing phone sex to get away from those psychic lines. the managers who hire you on psychic lines are literally paid cents to keep you working. its like slave work for me. i make way better money for less rules now. i noticed that in phone sex you really are a contractor. nobody tells you how to do your work. your the specialist and you set your own rules. with the psychic line i had to take every call that came in even when the caller was a jerk. with my phone sex job its like my own business so i can refuse a call if i dont like the caller for some reason. so if a guy is a jerk then i dont do the call. i dont work for tgs. i work for an internet company. i do some of my own ads and get my own calls. i'd rather do this now after doing both kinds of jobs. the phone sex company i work for is small and owned by one person but its like i have my own business. its not some big company so thats why they will pay you more. if you go looking for phone sex jobs look everywhere and at every site you can find. there are 100's of small little businesses all over the net and they are always hiring good women who want to work hard to make better money.
posted August 14, 2001 07:43 AM
I have added a folder for "phone acting" under the "WAHM Businesses" category for those of you who would like to discuss the details of this business.
posted August 14, 2001 08:27 AM
This sounds like a fantastic idea for those that are interested in thid line of work.....I can't wait to read and discover new opportunities....Thank you, so much for suggesting the folder.As always, some will throw in sour grapes...However, many will benefit from the new idea......
Peace be with you always.....
quote:Originally posted by wahmcheryl: I have added a folder for "phone acting" under the "WAHM Businesses" category for those of you who would like to discuss the details of this business.
quote:Originally posted by wahmcheryl: I have added a folder for "phone acting" under the "WAHM Businesses" category for those of you who would like to discuss the details of this business.
Cheryl :-)
This should be interesting... Thanks Cheryl!! Shayna's Mom
Thank you for asking about my work at home job. I take great pride in what I do. Some of you may not consider a psychic reader as a legit job, but let me tell you that I make good money ($11 per hour) and I help people. Just last night I had an alcoholic woman call me who was upset and didn't know what to do, she wanted to change her life but she felt as though there was nothing out there for her. I gave her the number for the ALON hotline, then continued to tell her that her life had many suprises in store for her and that she needed to change not only for herself but for those people who loved her. She seemed eager to help herself and I hung up the phone satisfied that I had helped this woman. I had three other similar calls last week and each time I feel as thought I have made a difference. NOw for those of you who are interested in doing this let me tell you that you do have to work and you do have to keep a daily average but that is just to ensure that everyone has an equal opportunity to get calls. Those people who work more often and harder get more calls, but I have never had any problems receiving calls. In fact the time between my calls averages about 3min. on a slow day it might be 10 min. but I have never had it go over that. As for where in my house, I picked my spare bedroom simply because it already has our computer table and it is away from others. You can do your readings pretty much any where you want to, it is really up to you. I bought a cordless phone with volume control so I could turn it way down at night. Now as for hours, you can work anytime you want, just yesterday I logged on while my baby napped and I got in 1.5 hours of talk time in the middle of the afternoon. Back to back calls. They do ask that the first week you work after 12 mindnight until you get use to it, then you are free to work whenever you want. They have never had me sell anything to my callers, they do offer free promotional things such as a deck of cards or a magazine but I have never had to ask for any type of money. As for being sued, I am not sure what that is about something about the billing of the calls which is actually done by another company. I work for Buckwood communications, the largest line in the USA and Canada, and I have never had a problem, with any of the managers, or callers. I know this isn't for everyone but I want to let those of you who are interested know the facts. Also I have checked in to two of the phone actress jobs both that I looked at only paid $9 an hour in the US. If you have any other questions please email me I would be glad to send you manager's name and number. Also as for weird people, I have never had anyone who was really weird, mostly depressed, or heart broken, all have been very nice people looking for friends. Good luck with your search for home employment.
quote:Originally posted by Shayna's Mom: Steph, I had seriously considered working for a psychic hotline awhile back. My husband kept trying to talk me out of it by saying "There's no guarentee you'll even get any calls!", "You could sit up all night waiting for the phone to ring and get 2 calls!" and "You'll get all kinds of weirdo's calling you - who else is going to be making those kind of calls in the middle of the night!".
I would love to hear more about your experience. Do you have to work at night to make the money? Do you get a lot of weirdos calling you? Do you get enough calls to make it worth it? Where in your house do you work? I couldn't figure out where in my house I could work that the family wouldn't hear the phone ringing all night! Did you get a special phone line installed? Would you mind sharing who you work for??
I had, after all, heard that people make a lot more money who do phone sex, but that was out of the question.
I wonder how many WAHM's are successful at making a fair income doing the Psychic lines???
Thanks for any info you are willing to share, Shayna's Mom
posted August 14, 2001 08:48 PM
I just got finished reading the ENTIRE message board for this topic.
I have been working as a "phone actress" for 3 weeks now and I absolutely love it. I am married and my husband supports me 100%.
We don't have children, so this is a great job.
I noticed some people posted messages about wanting to get into this job.
If you are interested, here is some basic info.
With my company, you have to work a minimum of 20 hours per week. You have to have a 2nd phone line with an 800 number. (free to set up, only costs you 5 cents a minute)
You will make 1$ per minute that you are on the phone. This is GREAT money girls. My boss just asks that you do WORK and not slack off.
If you would like more details, please e-mail me at: [email protected]com I check my mail constantly.
sorry but I could not even BEGIN to get started on the whole debate on this job at the moment. LOL
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posted July 26, 2001 06:00 PM
