As a parent, you should know that baby duties should be a shared responsibility between you and your partner. It may be fun at first, especially with all the coos and smiles, but as the feeding and diapering responsibilities start piling up, either one of you could be seething with anger when the other one simply walks out of the responsibilities. So, how should you talk to your partner about sharing an equal portion of the parenting load? Find out below.
Speaking up to your spouse about your concern of sharing baby duties is the key to starting a compromise on parenthood responsibilities between you and your partner. If you don't explain to him that you need a break, that you think you're overworked as a parent and that you feel very tired at the end of the day, how is your partner supposed to know? Ask your spouse for some time to talk about it. Explain your side and tell him that since the child belongs to both of you, it is also a given that baby duties should be fairly divided too.
After your spouse has agreed to dividing parenting responsibilities equally, it is also important that you specify which area you need some help with. Don't just tell him that you need some help--be specific as to which tasks you need assistance with. You could probably come up with a list of domestic and baby duties and then divide it between you and the spouse.
Take a Stand
Be firm and push for equal sharing of baby duties. Many women do not get a 50/50 deal unless they are firm about it. Studies also show that men take cues from their partners on what they're supposed to do. As a woman partner, be clear on what you want your partner to do and ask if he agrees to it.
It is also important that you are flexible when it comes to sharing baby duties. Keep in mind that whatever technique works for you in diapering may not be work for your husband. As long as the job's done, there's no need for you to nag about how clumsy your partner is when it comes to doing his share of baby duties.
Aside from being flexible, you might want to be considerate too. One good example is one's body clock. Perhaps your husband is one of those night owls that can last until the wee hours of the morning. Why not let him do the night duty in looking after the child while you take charge of the activities during the day?
Brag about It
Be proud of your household arrangement. Praise your husband in front of other parents in the neighborhood. Do not do overdo it, as it may simply embarrass your spouse. Many parents would want to do the same arrangements but most of them find it difficult to start with. You and your spouse can act as role models and being proud about it will only reinforce your love for each other.