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Ode to The Stalwart Queen Mother

by Kathie Woods

GOD is So Good
-- even at the Wal Mart!

As we went in search of the little sandpaper piece to finish the repair on the tub; I wandered over to where the coffeepots do dwell... Lonely for Homes and Families and Breakfast table conversation and late evening Phone Calls that amble along, too long sometimes, yet never long enough to share all the Laughter of the Silly Laundry Adventure.... The pots no one has taken to them to Perk a little extra Zoom in the day or Welcome a Friend with a Mug O Life to the Table of Friendship.

There they were lined up, cold in boxes on a shelf digital foo foo clocks and hinged baskets with a Super Capacity chamber. If it would only Fold the Clean Laundry-- I might sell a child to get one. They have fancy names and sound like the Universe is at Stake IF you don't have this One Type of coffeepot. Truly, my 5 year old was in Fear for us IF we didn't get the Commanding Coffee Maker.... She believes NeverLand *might* be a real place though, so her counsel is a bit Suspect.

There, on the bottom shelf, alone, dusty, and of no particular importance was my Heart's desire.... THE perfect coffeepot for Me. It even Looks like me, Shiny, with a dark top and a sorta Barrel Shape that could-- if it had any reason to-- toddle about on it's Stubby Legs on a Grand Adventure to say, the Front Room, set a spell and enjoy the Witty Chatter of the Pre-Schoolers. No One wants That kind of coffeepot anymore.... so there it sat. Waiting, but not Hopeless....

coffee pot

Back in the Good Ole Days, no wedding reception would have been complete without it. Lucy and Ethel would have had a Terrified half hour of Zanity trying to replace it before The Band stopped by for "afters." Ethel woulda been practical and just snatched it up, Lucy woulda wanted The Deal.... we would Never have believed Any of it, but We'd have laughed all the same....

As my chillens kept lookin at all the Fancy Goo Ga's and pointing out the "Low, Low Everyday Price" of all those Usurpers of Coffee Pretensions with their designer colors and radiant clocks and Timers with weather announcements.... I just kept smiling at that Familiar Shape of many a childhood morning.... waiting for that Light to come on and Peace to Reign in the kitchen again.... some Hope that This day would be Good. Or at least start off in a Non Argument other than the minor Fuss over the Sugar Spoon being left IN the sugar! ya'd think he'd learn after all these Years-- and it sounded like a mere Geological Period the way she said it--that sugar spoons Rest, got that, R-est on the spoon R-est! Then they'd snuggle into their cups, we three would munch and crunch and for 15 minutes we were At Peace.

Something like That must cost a Mint, was my thought. I stood there, looking at the "Low, Low, Everyday Prices" for air and almost did Not squat down with my jean skirt tucked under my knees just to Peak and see how Far out of my reach this Memory was. I almost fell over on my Face and busted my specs! This pristine preciousness was Cheaper-- by a good $3-- than the cheapest of the coffeepot floozies. No, no way?! I looked again at Each and Every yellow tag. I read them Out Loud, and the kids echoed me, they thought it was another Comparison Shopping Lesson and the QUIZ would follow any second, and Everyone wants to be the First to figure it out.

Oldest daughter caught on first to the fact I was not comparing the Floozies, but was eyeing the Stalwart Queen Moma of Coffeepots. And she said those fateful words that Sealed the Fate of the Queen Moma, "I can't believe That one is CHEAPER than all these Little ones!" Ah, the tingle of my Genius Child's words filled me. Only a mother could Know that excitement of *I have made a difference in One Life!* as their progeny Notices an Obvious Fact and then Verbalizes it in a Polite Tone, using Proper Grammar and perfect Emphasis on the relevant words.

And so, as they all huddled around the little tags, Amazed, as only MY chillens could be, I raised High the Queen Mother of Coffeepots and lovingly clutched her to my bosom that had nurseled the young ones nearby <> In Reverence, we placed her in the cart, next to the sand paper, the gallon of milk, the dish soap and the two taco seasoning packets.

Triumphantly, in a Fine Procession of many in a row we steered a course for the check out. Unashamed of our Thrill at finding this Gracious Addition to our home. We loaded her securely in the back of the van and rode her home in Style that could Never reach her stature-- 6 whites and 2 coachman would have been More Appropriate, but alas, I don't Have that ....

She has made me 3 perfect Mugs O Life, Moriah, sat on a stool in front of it watching for the Light the first time she perked away... Too Excited to Miss the gurgles, the jumps, the Perks of this Essential Element to our Kitchen. I have let Jack wash "the guts" of her already, After all, he's been confirmed and has handled plumbing, duct work and even, on occasion, Can remember to take out the Trash... I felt he was Ready for this awesome responsibility. Emily has been allowed to push the Flipper to make the Elixir Exit and Rush forth in steaming Life Filling near Sludge. Ah, she is almost convinced she's ready to be President of the Congress-- I know she is.

There it sits, bright and shiny this morning, warming up the very Fuel that keeps me so Patient with my daily God Given Tasks of Laundry, Meals and 400 questions/ hour AFTER coffee. My Miracle Urn.... 42 cup capacity, Ready to Serve me and Anyone who would amble up the Hill to our Pok'eball Trailer of Adventure. And if no one comes, well, I am set for the Week to reheat and Go Forth in Eager Anticipation of More Adventures and 400 More Questions/ Hour and Maybe, God Willing, to find those Missing Socks.

Kathie is a busy mom of 6 and author of the book "The Backbone of Joy".
Her book can be purchased from her web site:

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