How honest should you be?

[TheUnextreme]

As far as with tarot readings, I have had a few ones where it was hard to put things nicely. I am not very experienced- I usually only read for myself now...especially after a few that I struggled with putting gently.

So, if the outcome clearly isn't what this person was hoping for, how honest are you? If it's like a nightmare that you see, what do you tell them??

[Karen Jo Knowingangel]

I give them the information as it comes thru, good or bad, but with compassion. I try to give the session the same way I would want to receive it. It's never easy delivering bad news, but I feel it's important for them to know that they are getting accurate and truthful answers as they have come thru.

I hope that helps, it does get easier with time!

[Betsy]

I agree with Karen Jo. It's never easy telling someone bad/sad news, whether it is you are not getting that new job you are hoping for, he/she is not the one for you, or, you aren't getting that loan/line of credit from the bank.

Over time, like the song says, 'Break It To Me Gently.' and it can be done.

I'd rather tell the truth and keep my integrity. I never tell someone what they want to hear, I tell the truth.

Betsy Balega

[home]

When I see something that doesn't look good, I tell my client what I see but use it as a tool to help her navigate around the problem. Usually, "bad news" cards come with a warning. (for example, a card that carries a warning of illness may follow another card that indicates a lack of rest or good self-care) The future isn't fixed. We have the power to change it if we heed the warnings. I also work with my spirit guide and angels so they are help me in the process of seeing the bigger picture.

[TheUnextreme]

Thanks everyone! Those are all really great pieces of advice. It is very hard for me to break things gently. I know that I hate hearing bad news and I feel for them. But also, when I have seen psychics in the past, I always wanted to hear it straight up. So I need to keep that in mind.

Thanks everyone!

[Betsy]

In time, and with more and more readings, you'll know how to tell bad news in the kindest way possible.

When you are truthful and your clients see that you were being honest, you're integrity and reputation as a reader will grow. You'll get more business by word of mouth. People, once they have one good reading, with one good psychic, are sure to tell their friends.

I know that will be happening for you soon.

Betsy

[TheUnextreme]

All great tips. Thanks for the uplifting words Betsy! I am sure it will come easier with practice and experience. I need to stop being so afraid.

Emily

[EmpathicHeart]

My classic example is the woman who called and wanted me to say where she was calling from. The echo helped me as I answered the bathroom, and she confirmed she was on the toilet. She was munching and her next test question was to tell her what she was eating. I said Doritos and she gave me partial points; the correct answer would be Doritos dipped in mayonnaise. She decided I "passed" and asked me her real question: would she lose a hundred pounds that summer. True story.

She didn't want truth, balancing a bag of Doritos and a mayonnaise jar on her knees because she couldn't bear to be parted from them long enough to poop while waiting for me to tell her she would become Scarlet Johannsen in a few months. She came looking for and intending to purchase a lie.

And what would happen when summer came and went? She would still be greasing the bathtub and her obesity wouldn't be her fault...it would now be the fault of the lying advisor who promised she would become thin. And whoever that advisor was, she looked until she found that one that told her the lie she wanted to hear, and after that summer replaced him with another one that said she would be svelte by Christmas, a third promising a petite size by spring. She's no longer fat due to poor diet/lack of exercise, but because of lying advisors.

I have never, never, ever gotten a bad review for telling good news. And sometimes I actually have good news (!) but it turns into a very old and tiring routine to be reading for someone and they're confirming your intuition completely and think you're the most wonderful thing since sliced bread, UNTIL you have to relate a non-fantasy outcome. The cup of their excitement empties on the floor and they "don't understand". They may understand their ex left a year ago, they may understand he's avoided them ever since, what they don't understand is that I'm NOT telling them he's coming up the street with roses and chocolates. I've had people tell me automatically "I'm not paying for that", and what a revealing statement. Supposedly seeking honesty, the reading's value, for the majority of callers, can be measured by it's sugar content.

I've also noted people going beyond abdication of personal responsibility to full blown abdication of common sense as to what changes a reading is supposed to make in their lives. Because I've been accurate in the past, callers take a leap from "he said it would happen and it happened" to a superstitious level that ANYTHING I say in the context of a reading might change their future...people plead with me or cajole me to "change my reading" as if I were god and all I need to do is say something different will happen, and perhaps there's a chance it will come true, because the other things I said came true. I've confronted two different callers on this just lately, asking "what possible change do you think is going to happen if you convince me to tell you a happy story?" and they become evasive.

Hey, I can be wrong. Call another advisor. Please.

I do understand some people are at their last rope, and I'm always in the frame of mind that I'm trying to be a blessing and empower the folks who ask me for readings, but my kisses are too sweet to soil my mouth with lies and I'm too old to keep track of them. I rarely block people, but when I do it's usually because they need to avoid psychic readings altogether, when they use it almost as a drug to check out of dealing with the real, and gotten rather unpleasant when this is brought to their attention. On the other hand, I have regulars who call me from time to time for years who approach readings with a more healthy attitude...where am I at, what are my options, what am I missing, what work do I need to do on myself. An entirely more active interest in and responsibility for their lives.

[Lainie40]

I do believe the true and honest route is the best way to go. You should tell what you see. I am careful to be compassionate esp with broken hearts and people in financial ruin. These folks can be on an emotional edge and they need support and guidance, they also need hope. I let them know that although things look down and bleak now, that there is always change and new opportunities on the horizon. They may be difficult to see at times, but they are there. I try to end on a positive note, even with bad news, however I do not jump in and say "Mr Right will show up in 6 months" for example, I stick to the truth of the reading. The two things I do not address in my readings are direct health issues and death. I hope this helps!

[TheUnextreme]

Hi Lainie! Thank you- that does help a lot. I'm not good at telling things other than how they are exactly, which is my problem. It's kind of why I am hesitant about pursuing this path.

I have a question for you though. You said that you don't go into health or death issues. I have never foreseen death in anyone or how they will die. Is that something that you can pick up instantly? I've always wondered if some psychics can tell how someone or when someone will die as soon as they meet them.