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Old 05-19-2007, 04:43 AM
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Ok ladies. I'm new here. My name isMelissa and I am a new Army wife. We have an almost 8 month old son.My husband is signing his papers today (maybe even as we speak). I understand about bootcamp. I know he goes there for 9 weeks and I'm stuck here missing him something fierce. Then he graduates and goes straight into AIT (I think). Then thats where it gets foggy for me. His brother-in-law says that 2 months after going into AIT that I should move there because then he will be able to come off base and such. His recruter (who we already knows lies straight through his teeth) says that I shouldn't move there until after AIT because he wouldn't get to leave base until then. PLEASE tell me whats going on and when I should start looking for a place. And how does that work anyhow. I've never moved from the city I live in. How do you go about moving to a whole new state that you know nothing about? Does the Army help you at all??
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Old 05-19-2007, 01:24 PM
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Hi Melissa





Where is your husbands AIT at? AIT for my husband was at Ft. Gordon but that was also 6 years ago. My son and I stayed with my parents until he was finished with AIT.(I hadneverleft home or been away from my family until we moved)Once he was given his PCS orderswe started scheduling for transportation & all other fun things you do when you move. It's hard to be away but it's also just the beginning there will be more to come.
I know there are some wives whomove w/their husbands while they are in AIT, it's my understanding the army will not pay to move you unless his AIT is more than so many months long andit willdepend on a lot of thingsaccording tohow much time you will spend with him while he's in training if youdecide to move.You can also request a sponsor at the base you guys are going to.
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Old 05-19-2007, 09:05 PM
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Hey! Well his AIT is scheduled to be in Misouri. Its 11 weeks long. And I just found out a few hours ago that he is leaving for boot camp on Thursday :'( I think I will stay here while he is in AIT although its going to absolutely kill me. (I've never been away from my family either... I know thats going to be hard on me) If you don't mind mwilliams can I pm you? Thanks for your reply!!
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Old 05-20-2007, 07:33 AM
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Hi Mellisa, Every unit is different my DH was a Drill Seargent for the MP's at FLW. I personally would wait until he gets his orders after Basic and AIT are over. They may sometimes get a pass to come off post (if someone doesnot screw that up) but that is not often. You will also have an issue about housing the housing for Juniour enlisted is not great then you will be moving by yourself with an 8 month old, no fun and your BAH is not great either. He wil only be gone for 17 weeks that really is not a long time in the whole scheem of things. If you need to talk please PM me. Are you ready for life in the military? The Army wives handbook is a great read and resource. As many of the spouses here can tell you it is hard, very hard. Lots of long lonely days and nights. They call us dependents but you will become if you are not already the most independent person there is. We have to be WE DO everything. We have 16 years in and it is a good life but in the beginning not so good. Hugs to you sweety hang in there.
Lisa
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Old 05-20-2007, 08:11 AM
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I would also caution you not to move during his AIT. The military won't pay for any move for less than 6 months usually. Visit if you can, certainly. But don't move. Especially with that little one. You could use your family's support during this time. Once he is done with AIT, you should be able to go wherever he goes. Definitely learn all you can about the army and what to expect. Do internet searches on whatever command he goes to. Most commands have websites with support information. And feel free to ask as many questions as you'd like here. Many of us have lots of experience. I was in the Navy myself for 6 years, and have been a Navy wife for 13.

Deanna
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Old 05-20-2007, 11:50 AM
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They actually have a book out for Army wives? So far Aaron has only signed up for 4yrs, but if he likes it he's talking about signing up for longer. The big problem there is my family. They don't want me and our son moving anywhere that isn't 5 or less hours away. See and in the beginning Aaron had only planned on signing up for 3yrs, so I swore to them we'd be back living here in 3yrs. Well, now he's signed up for 4yrs so they want me and our son back here in 3yrs. Its complicated. I love my family. We are very close nit. But, I don't want to be away from my husband. I just want to scream sometimes, I swear! Anyhow thanks Lisa for all your support. I truely appreciate having people to talk to. Hugs


Melissa
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Old 05-20-2007, 01:57 PM
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Sure, PM me with any questions or if you just want to talk.

Rebecca
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Old 05-20-2007, 08:37 PM
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Well, 5 hours by plane can get you pretty much anywhere in CONUS. That's not so bad!

Hun, as hard as it is, your husband and your son are your "family" now. Everyone else is now in the extended family category. Unless they are supporting you financially, I'm not sure how they can tell you where you can and cannot live. The added stress isn't good for you or your relationship with your spouse. I wouldn't want to be away from my husband either. How can they ask you to do that? How can they expect your child to be away from his father? Again, I don't think you should move until after AIT, but after that off you go. You're a family now.

Deanna
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Old 05-20-2007, 08:38 PM
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Woops, didn't mean to sound preachy or anything. All that is said with a hug.
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Old 05-21-2007, 01:42 AM
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hi hon...i am an army wife & i am here for you if you need the support...i understand what your feeling...things are happening so fast right now...that your dizzy...when my husband left for BCT it killed me...this was the 1st time we were ever apart...so it was hard...but the 9wks will fly by...especially you have your little one to keep you busy...plus you can use this time to learn about the army & what role you play as a spouse...i can direct you to a site that helped me alot...plus send him lots of letters & pictures...my husband said it helped him alot & it kept him motivated...he even told me that he would share his letters & pictures with those who didn't receive anything or didn't have a family...he would share the kids letters & pictures...just to help the others finish & cope with the training...plus on graduation day it will be so worth the wait when you see him...you will love each so much more than ever...where are you at?...is it far from missouri?...if it is not far you can visit him on the weekends...i know that they work in phases at AIT...we moved over to where my husband was at in AIT...he was going for 20wks...so we decided after the 1st month he was there & it helped...we didn't get there until after the 2nd month...it was the best decision we ever made...he finished the top of the class & it was an experience for our girls...because they never left guam...that is where we are from...plus his drill sgt was so supportive on having family close by...they know that they will get 110% from their soldiers...so i think it will also depend on the drill sgt he gets at AIT...PM if you have anymore questions...as for family...i know where you are coming from...my family & his family didn't want me & the girls leave while he was at AIT...they said wait until after he finish...but when it comes to your family...you have to do what is best for your family...if your husband needs you both...that is where you are needed...we don't regret the decision that we made for our family...our family has gotten strong & so much closer...just PM me for anything...
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