While there is not just one good way to learn how to talk to your kids
about sex, there are some techniques to consider. Sexual education is
an important issue that needs to be confronted. If you fail to have this
important conversation with your children, they face the risk of STDs,
unwanted pregnancies and other possible serious sexual problems later on
in life. Here is how to discuss sex with your children:
Step 1: Begin Early
Children begin noticing their sexual body parts at an early age and usually start talking about them and asking questions. This is a good time to start the conversation. Be clear, concise and matter of fact. It is important that you child not be embarrassed to talk about her body. Answer all questions without elaborating and provide precise details when it is appropriate.
Step 2: Teach Body Part Names
Rather than use pet names, refer to sexual body parts by using their real names. This will help when your child gets older and it becomes time to have a more in-depth discussion about sex. Silly names do not provide the right attitude about sex for children to understand. Using correct terminology will help to prevent hang-ups from occurring later on in life.
Step 3: Use Current Events
Let current events lead the way to having a discussion about sex with your child. Often, your child may have a question about a TV show, movie, or something she sees outside or hears on the news. It is easy to launch into a discussion about sex when this occurs. Be honest and explain what you feel they can easily understand at the age they are when they ask. You can always elaborate later when the time is right.
Step 4: Discuss Kinds of Sex
Oral and anal sex should be covered in the conversation since these are areas that can also produce risks for STDs and AIDS. Be frank about these types of sex as your child may encounter information about them later and become confused if they are not discussed.
Step 5: Leave Yourself Out of It
Refrain from giving out personal information about yourself when discussing sex. The subject could be embarrassing for your child and yourself and could just make it more uncomfortable.
Step 6: Don't Omit Information
Areas like masturbation and fantasies should not be off limits. Your ongoing dialogue about sex with your child should be realistic, informative and open. If you omit information, your child will most likely feel embarrassed to bring it up later. Encourage your child to discuss any and all of the sexual issues that they have questions or concerns about. For example, you can let your child feel at ease about masturbation, but indicate that it should be done in privacy.
As long as your child has a healthy curiosity and is not engaging in thoughts about sex excessively, it should be considered a normal part of life to have questions about. This is the best way to approach sex as a subject with your child and to ensure that she does not have unpleasant issues later in life to deal with.