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How to Deal with Your Spouse's Military Deployment


The pain and stress associated with military deployment doesn't get easier the more you go through it. You just learn to cope better. Your friends who aren't married to someone in the military really don't understand what you're going through, and you may find yourself in a city or town with limited or no support. If you're preparing for your spouse to leave for duty, here is how to deal with the deployment:

Write and Write Often

Keep the lines of communication open with your spouse by writing and sending letters. If he has access to email, then write emails as well. Letter writing is an excellent outlet for your feelings and it gives you the opportunity to express your love for him. Avoid communicating fear in your letters though, because he has enough to deal with where he is. The letters give you opportunities to keep him updated about the family, but also to strengthen your marital bonds. He'll look forward to those letters, and they may give you both hope to press on.

Find an Online and Offline Support Group

Having access to other wives going through or who have gone through military deployment may help you cope with the situation better. Military wives are often the best to encourage one another, and they will have specific advice that you can apply and may find helpful. A local or regional group would be your best option, but that may not be available where you live. Your next best option is to find an online group that has a forum where you can ask questions, or read the questions and answers provided by others.

Get to know the group first before sharing your story, to make sure you can trust the people you're meeting with. Some support groups consists of gossipers who aren't really there to help, but to feed on others. Use your discretion, but if you find a group that you can trust, then don't be afraid to open up.

Learn Something New

If you've always wanted to learn a new skill, then do it during a military deployment. Focusing on a new hobby or skill set may be just the ticket to help you take your mind off the deployment at least for an hour or more each day. If you are able to get out and attend a class, then that's even better. Being in the company of others can keep you from being isolated, and you'll have opportunities to develop friendships in a safe setting. For example, a cooking class is a great way to learn skills, but also to enjoy a meal with others.

Get Enough Sleep

Staying awake at night and not having enough energy during the day to care for your children, work on your business and manage your home will only make things worse. You need to get enough sleep, so that the stress of military deployment isn't multiplied due to the lack of sleep. Use music, read or use another technique to improve your sleep habits.

Military deployment is difficult and there's no way around that. However, you can maintain a healthy and strong marriage and get through it, and these steps can help.

Daphne Mallory, Esq. is the co-owner of Mallory Writing Services and has written more than 100 articles helping home based business owners and entrepreneurs start and market their business. You can learn more about her here.

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