Going through a divorce is not easy. People going through this process are emotionally vulnerable and stressed out; some are even in a state of denial and depression. Knowing the mistakes that should be avoided is the first step in rebuilding your life.
Here are common mistakes to avoid when going through a divorce:
Mistake #1 - Important Decisions are Piling Up
During the divorce process, you will endure a lot of stress and wide range of emotions. Many people make the mistake of letting important decisions pile up. Being situated in such a life changing position can make it hard to make decisions. It is not unusual to feel completely overwhelmed at this time, even when making small decisions.Decisions that must be addressed include finances, finding a new house and what to eat for dinner.
It is essential to create an action plan during times of indecisiveness. The simple act of making a list will help break the cycle of helplessness. Make a list of both big and small things that you have to face, and put an action plan in re-designing your life. It is important to learn to trust yourself and know that it is alright to make mistakes. Giving oneself permission to make mistakes or change one's mind will remove a lot of stress.
Mistake #2 -Losing Sight of What You Want
Due to painful emotions, another common mistake is to lose sight of what you really want. You may have found that you've lost yourself when you are in a relationship. You give up what you like and want. Harboring anger and resentment will cause you more heartache. It is important to face unresolved emotions and address them, not doing this will just keep you stuck in pain and it will prevent you from moving on to rebuild your life.
This is the appropriate time to go and discover yourself once again. Explore the talents you have and what makes you tick. It may be hard at first, but you need to choose your own path and not one that is dictated by "should". If you do this, you will find new joy in your life.
Mistake #3 -Unrealistic Expectations or Demands from the Divorce
There are tendencies that people start the divorce expecting that they will get everything they want and demanded. In a divorce proceeding, matters concerning children and property must be met reasonably. Have a realistic expectation, focus on problem solving and do everything to help your case.
Mistake #4 -Withholding Information from Your Lawyer
It is important to trust your divorce lawyer. You and your lawyer need to work with utmost trust since your rights needed to be protected. Withholding information and avoiding the truth may lead you to being penalized by the court. It is important to inform your lawyers the whole truth so that they may do an effective job on your case.
Mistake #5 -Being Overly Emotional
It is common to be emotionally distraught during divorce. However, try to keep your emotions in check and not let it interfere with making logical decisions. In times like this, it is important to be reflective than being anxious, since anxiety will hinder your ability to express yourself clearly.
Mistake #6 -Not Knowing Your Financial Position
If you have no idea of your own assets and properties, now is the time to get your records in order. It is essential that you are aware of your properties from tangible assets to investments to pensions and insurance. Be sure to have full and proper documentation of your transactions and dealings. Also, have duplicates of these documents to save time tracking it. It is also equally important to know the terms and conditions of your financial statements and documents. This is very important since your lawyer will help and work to protect your best interests with respect to your properties before, during and after the divorce.
Having these things in mind, you will be ready to avoid mistakes and able to concentrate on rebuilding your life.