WAHM Forums

I have a dilemma in that I have 3 people to choose from to be my sponsor. How do I choose?

Person 1: A good friend & co-worker- yet despite my many questions about the business, has chosen to ignore most of them which I don't get but seems bothered by me talking to others. Only offered me to attend a regional meeting that's 3 weeks away. I worry that if I don't choose her, it will ruin our friendship. She has not yet signed up but plans to for June 1st.

Person 2: A co-worker - Invited me to lunch and was very excited and extremely open about the business experience. She told me more and was more excited than anyone else I ever talked to about A*****. After meeting with her, my initial reaction was "I want to be on her team." She's been in business for about 10 months and had serious plans about her future in the business.

Person 3: A friend of a friend - A SAHM who has been in business for 2+ years and also extended a lunch invitation. Has an interesting way of doing the business which I like. Her direct sponsor is a Regional Vice President.

Would it just be easier to pick someone I don't work with? Should I pick the most enthusiastic person? Should I pick the friend simply b/c she's my friend? I'm torn. Please help. (I've let each person I've talked to know that I've talked to other people so there are no secrets there. I just want to be fair to them and myself by doing my research.)

The general rule I like to use is to go with the person who first introduced you to the opportunity. Thats just me. You should go with the person will benefit and be there for you the most, and is also enthusiastic about the biz.

It is a very hard decision to make. My thought here it to pick the person you think you can work with and benefit from. You want to be able to ask questions and get the answers. You want someone who can show you the ropes and support your efforts. Someone who is enthusiastic about the business but willing to let you run your business. (does that make sense?)


My bestfriend growing up signed with her sister-in-law after asking me a ton of questions. She was very up front with me about who she was signing with. Not a problem, I gave her all the support she needed from me. She felt she had to sign with her. She is now wishing she signed with me. (long story short she does not work well with her sister in law).


I hope this helps.


Jen

If the person who introduced you is not answering your questions or responding to you now is there something to indicate that this will change once you sign up? That doesn't seem very likey to me. As someone looking for a business, I do not agree that you should just go with the 1st person who tells you about Arbonne, this doesn't always work out (as mentioned above). Do your research, your due diligence. Look at what each person has to offer you in leadership and where they are going. This is a business, you would not take the 1st loan that was offered to you, you would research your options for the best rate & service. You would not go with the 1st vendor that offered you supplies, you would research your options for the best fit.


If I had been faced with the 3 choices you presented, I would go with someone with enthusiasm &who has a plan. This business is about having a plan and working a system consistently. It is NOT about flying by the seat of your pants or working haphazardly.


Perhaps you could ask each one point blank "Once I sign up, what are your plans for getting me off to a solid start?"


Good luck!

As consultants we are taught to refer people back to their original consultant... however,it's your decision as to who you want to be your upline/leader/mentor and you should be comfortable with who you choose. One thing that I know is that you'll get more from your sponsor when your sponsor has YOUR best interests at heart, instead of her own. Edited by: cassandra

the reason why I usedthe words, "upline/leader/mentor" is to get you thinking more about their role, than about your emotions.

Thank You all so much for your replies!

In response to "who first introduced me" - that person is someone I met a while ago and have no contact with right now. Out of those 3 people, I knew about the friend first however she was not selling and I was still skeptical. And still when I asked her about what she was doing with it - I got very short answers as if she didn't want to talk to me about it. I ended up hearing about the 2nd person in casual conversation with her and her enthusiasm made me immediately want to really sit down and talk to her. The 3rd person I knew of quite a long time but just made contact with after I got interested again.

I'll take any other responses!

I also have another question...

Do any of you sahm have single women on your teams? I worry with the 3rd person, I'd be the only single woman with no kids and might feel out of place.

If your friend hasn't signed up yet, do you know who she is signing up under? That person would really be the one responsible for training both of you, if you come in at the same time. Perhaps you should try to find out what type of team she is signing up onto as well. I can tell you I have gotten more direct training and support from my sponsor's sponsor than I did from my sponsor, who was new when I signed up as well. Now that lady is a VP and my sponsor has dropped out after a few months. So you need to look up the line, too.


ANd the best way to ward off problems in the future is to communicate openly now!


As far as being single, I have several on my team. It doesn't matter to me at all what the personal situation is, I don't think that would have any bearing.


Good luck!

I agree with pretty much everything that's been said, you should go to the original if we are going to go by the book on this - however, I also agree you should pick what's best for you. With what you have told us, I wouldn't pick someone who can't or won't answer questions. It sounds like she hasn't even signed up yet so maybe that's why she can't answer them. I think you need to meet her sponsor and team.


If I had to do this all over personally, I would have done more research about my "team". I LOVE my direct sponsor and the 2 above her are great too but I am not crazy about the rest of the group and the direction they are headed and how they run their business. I knew nothing about them and if I had met them and knew more about their own style and way they treat people, there is no question I would not have joined their line because in the end, your success is their success and you will have contact with them in the future so you may as well make sure now that they are people you want to work with.So, if you want to check them out, consider "interviewing" the team so to speak. Tell the people you are considering that you want to have coffee with the team to find out their methods and how they do their business - or go to an Opp Meeting. Have them explain the policies to you and their interpretation of them. If you were considering a job offer with a different company, you would be weighing every pro and con from the salary, commute time and who you work for and their vision and I think this should be taken somewhat in the same light and seriousness.


edited - ok, I wrote this while getting my kids breakfast and other people wrote too in between when I started and finished, I understand who introduced who better now, but I would still find out all about the team and make your decision based on the whole picture, not just one person. Edited by: sportsmom

Very good sportsmom!smileys/smiley2.gif Definetly ask to meet the upline and ask questions! I signed under a good friend of mine to help her out, but she dropped out and I do not care for the way my upline does the business. Yes, it is YOUR business, and you can do it w/o the help of an upline, but it is so much easier to succeed when you have an upline that you click with for encouragment and training.


I am just gonna say it: There is alot of sneaky and un-ethical stuff going on in some teams. People are getting burned and used and you need to find out the motivations and goals of your upline. Some people are in arbonne to build a business of selling retail/wholesale wonderful products to people to really help them and their skin. Some are in it just to get the car in 6 months and some are in for both. Nothing wrong with wanting to make good money while helping others too.What do you want? Make sure your philosphies match with their philosphies. What will they do to help you reach your goal? Are they willing to help you no matter what your investment is? Even $29? Will they still assist you when you have slow months, or don't meet the expectations in sales?


Personally, I was deleted from the email distribution list in my nation when my sales were low, twice. I was told it was a mistake when the roster was updated, but twice? I don't think so. Like everyone has said, look at it as interviewing. These will be people YOU will be making money for. Do they deserve benefiting from your hard work?

To address the ? about single women on teams - I don't think that would really matter per say - but make sure the team you choose can meet your needs. Do you want to attend monthly meetings? If so, when are they? Are they currently at a time that you are with your kids? Will you be happy cutting that time short or missing the meetings? Are their monthly/weekly conference calls? If so, when are they. Ours are at a time that doesn't work for me & my life style soI choose not to go, but that's my choice and I am fine with that. I would rather miss the meetings/calls than have my kids miss me tucking them in at night. Others on my "team" feel the same so we have now started our own meetings at a time that works better for our schedules which is a terrific solution for us.

OK, I’m going to pretty much agree with the fantastic advice already given.
<?:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />
This decision is an important one b/c you are going to have to deal with the consequences throughout your career. Ultimately, the business is up to you &amp; your activity level. There are people who have amazing sponsors but still end up unsuccessful &amp; there are people who have lousy sponsors but still end up VP’s. So don’t let this decision cripple you into a non-decision where you just don’t do it!<BR style="mso-special-character: line-break"><BR style="mso-special-character: line-break">
Yes, we are always supposed to refer back to the original consultant but sometimes that just isn’t an option. I could tell you which one I would go with but that’s me, not you &amp; the same thing may not be right for you. I think you should “interview” all of them. So make some lists. List the pro’s &amp; con’s of joining each team. Also write out what are absolute musts for your team to do/have &amp; absolute deal breakers. This should give you a pretty clear idea of what you should do.

As far as your friend goes, this business is great to do with friends. It makes it so much more fun to be able to motivate each other &amp; help each other. This is a team after all. Hopefully, if she is a real friend then you can talk to her about your concerns. Ask her why she’s reacting that way &amp; not answering your questions. Let her know that it’s causing you to have reservations. Surely she can understand that if she is unwilling to be helpful now then that indicates to you that she’ll be unwilling to be helpful later. Maybe she just doesn’t understand it or know enough to answer your questions. And if that is the case then you MUST find out about her future upline b/c that will be the person who steps in as your sponsor &amp; teaches you the business. Have you guys thought about her signing up under you instead? If you want to join in May &amp; she doesn’t want to in June then that might make sense.

Bottom line, you are getting into a business to help you &amp; your family. You need someone who is going to help you be successful &amp; that means teaching you, motivating you &amp; holding your hand at the beginning. The person you are joining should have your best interest at heart. They should be working for YOU. And they need to be doing an approach that you are comfortable with duplicating.

And I wouldn’t worry too much about being the only single person on the team. One of the great things about this business is making friends with people you never thought you would. Also as the team grows there will be a lot more diversity added so who knows how many other singles will be on your team!

I worry that if I don't choose her, it will ruin our friendship.



If that's true, you don't have a friendship to ruin.

Thanks to everyone for your replies! I have made a decision in will most likely be going with Person #1. We had a complete mis-communication. As she thought I wasn't interested and I thought she wasn't interested in talking to me. We talked about it and all is fine now. Luckily, I think Person 1 and Person 2 and I will all be able to work together even though we won't be in the same line.





Thanks again!

Congrats on your decision &amp; good luck! Glad you cleared up the miscommunication.