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View Full Version : Vent! Long..What would you do?
nlove
12-05-2005, 09:14 AM
OK guys, I've purposely not posted this on the day or day after this happened because I was so upset and wanted to wait a couple of days to calm down from it. This happened last Friday:
My 14dd has a friend who's mom was planning her work's annual Christmas party. Friend's mom knows I do flowers for a living as well as Home & Garden. She came to my Open House held at the clubhouse where she lives (not to shop but to check out my things and how I displayed them). After my OH, she asks how much I would charge her to make up some simple fresh cut centerpieces for her party. I told her I would give her a great deal. She then tells me that she knows I sell HGP as well and if I could help her with the decorating at her Christmas party, she would let me set up my HGP products and sell them at her party's "store" that they set up. She explains they shop from one another at their parties since so many sell or have wives that sell with various direct sales companies. I tell her Iwill doprovide all the labor and supplies but she will need to purchase the cuts. She agrees. Two days before the event, she calls me to check and make sure I was coming to help her. I ask how many pieces she will need. She says, "Well, I've spent so much on this party, do you have enough Christmas product that we could just use it and spread it among all the food and such instead of buying flowers?" I tell her that since she is letting me set up and sell at her party, I will go ahead and buy the cuts myself and do the work for free as a Thank You. "Oh, you're so sweet," she says. She also asks if I have 8 cloth tablecloths that she can use for the tables as well. I show up at 8:30am (party starts at 10am) and help her and another lady set up for the party. I made up 6 cute centerpieces and one large centerpiece for the food table. I brought LOTS of Christmas product and had to unpack everything and put it all out. There are only two tables set up for venders (me and the other lady that was there helping her). Seems there isn't any more vendors coming either. Also, as she talked with the other lady, it made me think they worked together with the products the lady with selling (this is not a direct sales however but just a home business). Now I'm confused but continue to just set up and not ask questions. The other lady takes 1/4 of the table that was for me but still, I'm not saying anything. I begin to look for me a chair to place behind my table since the other lady already has her chair behind hers. After all is up and it's 10am and there must be 10 people who are already there, she walks up to me and says, "Ok, what time can you come and pick up your stuff tomorrow?" I'm like What? I tell her I came with the intention of working (I'm dressed in a suit with all my achievement pins and on everything!). She says, Oh.. I'm sorry... there must have been a misunderstanding. You don't need to be here. I tell her I have a party tomorrow and she says if I can come back at 6pm then. At this point I am floored. I have just been used to the hilt! There's no way I would have agreed to do all that I did without being able to stay there and sell my product. When she said I could come there and sell, I took it as just that. The other lady stayed there for the party and must have sold quite a bit because she was very jolly and full of smiles when I returned for my things. Of course, I don't have to tell you that the lady did not have even one thing of my products sold. Go figure! I had my dd help me and had everything packed in 15 minutes flat! I was upset and just wanted to leave. I think this lady thinks I am just some country bumpkin who has no education (she doesn't know that I went to college) and she acts like this is how she typically treats people. She even handed my dd all the tablecloths to put in my van after she told me in theAM that she would be sure they were cleaned when they were done. I took them straight out of the van and said, Hey... aren't you going to be cleaning these? And she says, "I can." I say, "Please do! I always clean them before storing them." I mean, she would have had me wash them things had I not caught it! Normally, if I would have been in my right state of mind, I probably would have told her that there's no way I was going to leave my product unattended and I wouldn't have even done all that had I not been told I could come and sell but she was in such a rush to get me out of there... I just didn't even have ANY words to say when it was happening. smileys/smiley18.gif
She still has my tablecloths and has not called me to set up a pick-up date. My dd does not want me to go off on her but I do want to tell her how disappointed I am in her "misunderstanding." She also said she was going to book a party in the AM while we were setting up because of all the work I had done in helping her but then in the PM when I returned for my things, she said, "I'll just call you with my order." To tell you the truth, I don't even want her to book or order anything. I don't like userssmileys/smiley7.gif I've taken these past few days to calm down from it because I don't want to say anything unprofessional or let it ruin my Christmas spiritsmileys/smiley2.gif I just wish people would follow the Golden Rule and treat others as they would like to be treated. I'm so giving, seems like I get taken advantage of quite a bitsmileys/smiley5.gifespecially from my kids.. but hey, at least they're family. I don't even know this lady that well.
What would you say to her (when she calls)?
My 14dd has a friend who's mom was planning her work's annual Christmas party. Friend's mom knows I do flowers for a living as well as Home & Garden. She came to my Open House held at the clubhouse where she lives (not to shop but to check out my things and how I displayed them). After my OH, she asks how much I would charge her to make up some simple fresh cut centerpieces for her party. I told her I would give her a great deal. She then tells me that she knows I sell HGP as well and if I could help her with the decorating at her Christmas party, she would let me set up my HGP products and sell them at her party's "store" that they set up. She explains they shop from one another at their parties since so many sell or have wives that sell with various direct sales companies. I tell her Iwill doprovide all the labor and supplies but she will need to purchase the cuts. She agrees. Two days before the event, she calls me to check and make sure I was coming to help her. I ask how many pieces she will need. She says, "Well, I've spent so much on this party, do you have enough Christmas product that we could just use it and spread it among all the food and such instead of buying flowers?" I tell her that since she is letting me set up and sell at her party, I will go ahead and buy the cuts myself and do the work for free as a Thank You. "Oh, you're so sweet," she says. She also asks if I have 8 cloth tablecloths that she can use for the tables as well. I show up at 8:30am (party starts at 10am) and help her and another lady set up for the party. I made up 6 cute centerpieces and one large centerpiece for the food table. I brought LOTS of Christmas product and had to unpack everything and put it all out. There are only two tables set up for venders (me and the other lady that was there helping her). Seems there isn't any more vendors coming either. Also, as she talked with the other lady, it made me think they worked together with the products the lady with selling (this is not a direct sales however but just a home business). Now I'm confused but continue to just set up and not ask questions. The other lady takes 1/4 of the table that was for me but still, I'm not saying anything. I begin to look for me a chair to place behind my table since the other lady already has her chair behind hers. After all is up and it's 10am and there must be 10 people who are already there, she walks up to me and says, "Ok, what time can you come and pick up your stuff tomorrow?" I'm like What? I tell her I came with the intention of working (I'm dressed in a suit with all my achievement pins and on everything!). She says, Oh.. I'm sorry... there must have been a misunderstanding. You don't need to be here. I tell her I have a party tomorrow and she says if I can come back at 6pm then. At this point I am floored. I have just been used to the hilt! There's no way I would have agreed to do all that I did without being able to stay there and sell my product. When she said I could come there and sell, I took it as just that. The other lady stayed there for the party and must have sold quite a bit because she was very jolly and full of smiles when I returned for my things. Of course, I don't have to tell you that the lady did not have even one thing of my products sold. Go figure! I had my dd help me and had everything packed in 15 minutes flat! I was upset and just wanted to leave. I think this lady thinks I am just some country bumpkin who has no education (she doesn't know that I went to college) and she acts like this is how she typically treats people. She even handed my dd all the tablecloths to put in my van after she told me in theAM that she would be sure they were cleaned when they were done. I took them straight out of the van and said, Hey... aren't you going to be cleaning these? And she says, "I can." I say, "Please do! I always clean them before storing them." I mean, she would have had me wash them things had I not caught it! Normally, if I would have been in my right state of mind, I probably would have told her that there's no way I was going to leave my product unattended and I wouldn't have even done all that had I not been told I could come and sell but she was in such a rush to get me out of there... I just didn't even have ANY words to say when it was happening. smileys/smiley18.gif
She still has my tablecloths and has not called me to set up a pick-up date. My dd does not want me to go off on her but I do want to tell her how disappointed I am in her "misunderstanding." She also said she was going to book a party in the AM while we were setting up because of all the work I had done in helping her but then in the PM when I returned for my things, she said, "I'll just call you with my order." To tell you the truth, I don't even want her to book or order anything. I don't like userssmileys/smiley7.gif I've taken these past few days to calm down from it because I don't want to say anything unprofessional or let it ruin my Christmas spiritsmileys/smiley2.gif I just wish people would follow the Golden Rule and treat others as they would like to be treated. I'm so giving, seems like I get taken advantage of quite a bitsmileys/smiley5.gifespecially from my kids.. but hey, at least they're family. I don't even know this lady that well.
What would you say to her (when she calls)?
CBTammy
12-05-2005, 09:57 AM
What would you say to her (when she calls)?
You don't want to know.smileys/smiley36.gif
Hmmm, really if you need the booking from her, I'd take it. But
if you are pretty full for the month already, I'd tell her "You know I
got to looking at my calender and it is already filled up! If you
still want to do a show, you could go through RANDOM PERSON ON YOUR TEAM</span>. I'm sure she would love</span> to help you!"
You don't want to know.smileys/smiley36.gif
Hmmm, really if you need the booking from her, I'd take it. But
if you are pretty full for the month already, I'd tell her "You know I
got to looking at my calender and it is already filled up! If you
still want to do a show, you could go through RANDOM PERSON ON YOUR TEAM</span>. I'm sure she would love</span> to help you!"
mkcecilia
12-05-2005, 11:02 AM
Nikki: By the time you get in touch with each other, I hope that YOU DO BOOK a party with her. I am so sorry, however, that you were treated this way. I would definitely "assume" the booking when you pick up your cloths and say, I have Jan.__ and __ opened JUST for your show! Does 7 PM sound good? While you are so mad at her right now, why not go ahead and get to know some of the people she knows...... Good Luck!!
whitelily
12-05-2005, 12:06 PM
Oh my gosh, I would be furious!
I agree though - you should have her hold a party. At least get some money off of this woman! Maybe you can even make some good contacts, new customers, etc.
I'm sorry you are dealing with this though. How frustrating. Don't let it get you down - afterall, karma is a bitch! smileys/smiley36.gifShe'll get what is coming to her...eventually!
I agree though - you should have her hold a party. At least get some money off of this woman! Maybe you can even make some good contacts, new customers, etc.
I'm sorry you are dealing with this though. How frustrating. Don't let it get you down - afterall, karma is a bitch! smileys/smiley36.gifShe'll get what is coming to her...eventually!
UNcommonScents
12-05-2005, 01:33 PM
Oh Nikki, what a NIGHTMARE!
I am so sorry- I would have been angry and frustrated to the point of
TEARS! smileys/smiley7.gif smileys/smiley19.gif smileys/smiley7.gif smileys/smiley7.gif smileys/smiley7.gif
I hope my suggestion on how to deal with this woman won't come off as
sounding harsh and give you the wrong idea about me. -I 'm the kind of
person who sells all of my items at almost wholesale cost to friends and
AT wholesale to family, always willing to bend over backwards to help a
fellow small businesswoman, etc...BUT.. due to my generous nature
and difficulty with confrontation, I have been BURNED like this so many
times that I do not allow people to walk all over me and take advantage of
my generosity any longer.
Here's what I would do, and I really hope you'll consider this. Type up a
very professional invoice for your services and BILL HER for everything
you did.After all, you are a PROFESSIONAL and she did not hold to her
end of the bargain. I would bill her for event planning professional
consult, supplies and set up. CHARGE her for everything you did for her,
and ALSO charge her for the table cloths since she hasn't returned them.
Just place it in there as [DEPOSIT OWED].
I would bill her BY THE HOUR for the time you spent with her on the
phone etc. and then 1.5 of that fee for your set up and breakdown fee. I
would also charge her 5% of the total value of the products you placed in
her event as "product placment fee".
If you get a responce from her (you probably won't) you can tell her that
since she had not followed through on her part of the deal to swap
services that she had chosen to just pay your consulting fees.
If she does not respond to your letter and you do not recoup any
compensation from her, with the invoice you may be able to file a small
claims suit. I don't know if you'd want to go that far, but at least sending
her the invoice is a reasonable step and will hopefully help you resolve
this.
It makes me so angry when people take advantage of others! smileys/smiley7.gif
Best of luck with this, and please let us know how it works out for you.
Hugs, smileys/smiley31.gif
--Kitt
I am so sorry- I would have been angry and frustrated to the point of
TEARS! smileys/smiley7.gif smileys/smiley19.gif smileys/smiley7.gif smileys/smiley7.gif smileys/smiley7.gif
I hope my suggestion on how to deal with this woman won't come off as
sounding harsh and give you the wrong idea about me. -I 'm the kind of
person who sells all of my items at almost wholesale cost to friends and
AT wholesale to family, always willing to bend over backwards to help a
fellow small businesswoman, etc...BUT.. due to my generous nature
and difficulty with confrontation, I have been BURNED like this so many
times that I do not allow people to walk all over me and take advantage of
my generosity any longer.
Here's what I would do, and I really hope you'll consider this. Type up a
very professional invoice for your services and BILL HER for everything
you did.After all, you are a PROFESSIONAL and she did not hold to her
end of the bargain. I would bill her for event planning professional
consult, supplies and set up. CHARGE her for everything you did for her,
and ALSO charge her for the table cloths since she hasn't returned them.
Just place it in there as [DEPOSIT OWED].
I would bill her BY THE HOUR for the time you spent with her on the
phone etc. and then 1.5 of that fee for your set up and breakdown fee. I
would also charge her 5% of the total value of the products you placed in
her event as "product placment fee".
If you get a responce from her (you probably won't) you can tell her that
since she had not followed through on her part of the deal to swap
services that she had chosen to just pay your consulting fees.
If she does not respond to your letter and you do not recoup any
compensation from her, with the invoice you may be able to file a small
claims suit. I don't know if you'd want to go that far, but at least sending
her the invoice is a reasonable step and will hopefully help you resolve
this.
It makes me so angry when people take advantage of others! smileys/smiley7.gif
Best of luck with this, and please let us know how it works out for you.
Hugs, smileys/smiley31.gif
--Kitt
littledb
12-05-2005, 01:58 PM
Just remember, Karma. But it bites and I'm sorry.
I would have said, "sorry, I always stay with my products. So if you want me to leave, I'll have to take everything with me."
Wish I had more advice. Just use it as a learning experience and let it go, or it will drain you.
Debbie
I would have said, "sorry, I always stay with my products. So if you want me to leave, I'll have to take everything with me."
Wish I had more advice. Just use it as a learning experience and let it go, or it will drain you.
Debbie
MegJB
12-05-2005, 02:12 PM
I agree with Kitt! This woman was obviously trying to get something for nothing, and if you send the invoice, you will at least send her the message that you are a professional business woman and your time is valuable. You might not get a response, but you will be sending a strong message. I would even follow up with a phone call!
I am not confrontational at all, but I have learned that standing up for yourself in a professional manner is always better than allowing yourself to be taken advantage of.
Good Luck!
and remember, what comes around goes around. You have good Karma for your generosity, and that will come back to you!
Meg
I am not confrontational at all, but I have learned that standing up for yourself in a professional manner is always better than allowing yourself to be taken advantage of.
Good Luck!
and remember, what comes around goes around. You have good Karma for your generosity, and that will come back to you!
Meg
tranquilityrose
12-05-2005, 02:44 PM
Nikki,
I know you are very passionate about what you do. It burns my biscuits when people take advantage of good people.
Wow! I really love the idea of billing her. I could just imagine the look on her face! smileys/smiley36.gif
BUT, I think you may need to take the high road on this one and remain professional.Who knows? Shemight be veryhappy with you and begin torefer your name to others. Stranger things have happened. Talk to her about a party, and see what happens.
Good luck!
I know you are very passionate about what you do. It burns my biscuits when people take advantage of good people.
Wow! I really love the idea of billing her. I could just imagine the look on her face! smileys/smiley36.gif
BUT, I think you may need to take the high road on this one and remain professional.Who knows? Shemight be veryhappy with you and begin torefer your name to others. Stranger things have happened. Talk to her about a party, and see what happens.
Good luck!
MizzRobin
12-05-2005, 02:50 PM
She says, Oh.. I'm sorry... there must have been a misunderstanding. You don't need to be here.
I would have said,
"Yes, there must be a misunderstanding".
The I would have packed it all up and left.
Unfortunely, we cant go on shoulda, woulda, coulda. I feel for you. Theres nothing worse than feeling that you have been used and taken advantage of.
If she calls, This is what I would say.
Tell her that your understanding was to personally be there to sell your products. You dont work for free and since you hardly even knew her ,it was all in exchange for her to let you sell ather party. The least she can do is to have a party so that you can make sales and get some new bookings.
What goes around comes around. You have been good at keeping the peace since this is your dd's friend. But I would be honest on how you feel and give her that chance to make things right. If she doesnt, then you know what kind of person she is and you will know not to have any more contacts with her again.
Good luck and please let us know what happens when she calls.
PS. I would have gotten her to take those table cloths to the dry cleaners. Thats just me though smileys/smiley2.gif
I would have said,
"Yes, there must be a misunderstanding".
The I would have packed it all up and left.
Unfortunely, we cant go on shoulda, woulda, coulda. I feel for you. Theres nothing worse than feeling that you have been used and taken advantage of.
If she calls, This is what I would say.
Tell her that your understanding was to personally be there to sell your products. You dont work for free and since you hardly even knew her ,it was all in exchange for her to let you sell ather party. The least she can do is to have a party so that you can make sales and get some new bookings.
What goes around comes around. You have been good at keeping the peace since this is your dd's friend. But I would be honest on how you feel and give her that chance to make things right. If she doesnt, then you know what kind of person she is and you will know not to have any more contacts with her again.
Good luck and please let us know what happens when she calls.
PS. I would have gotten her to take those table cloths to the dry cleaners. Thats just me though smileys/smiley2.gif
UNcommonScents
12-05-2005, 02:53 PM
Hi TranquilityRose!
I am just curious- do you think that billing her for all of that time and
effort (not to mention gas mileage, the unreturned tablecloths, etc.) is
unprofessional? If so, why?
I'm only asking because I like to understand other points of view. From
my perspective, it seems very professional TO BILL her! (And I mean to
bill her in a very businesslike, fair manner- not to be petty, mean, or
childish.) I just think that Nikki deserves to be compensated for her time,
or in the very least, have her tablecloths returned and receive an apology!
Her consumable products (flowers) time, and and FEELINGS seem worth
the compensation- either via the original agreement or payment for
services rendered.
Am I way off on thinking this way? I feel that not doing anything wouldn't
really be taking the high road in this case, it would be allowing an unkind
and manipulative person encouragement to keep doing what she's doing!
I am interested in getting more points of view on this, in the event I am
ever faced with a similar situation.smileys/smiley5.gif
Thanks!
--Kitt
DREAM + BELIEVE = ACHIEVE!Edited by: CreativiTEA
I am just curious- do you think that billing her for all of that time and
effort (not to mention gas mileage, the unreturned tablecloths, etc.) is
unprofessional? If so, why?
I'm only asking because I like to understand other points of view. From
my perspective, it seems very professional TO BILL her! (And I mean to
bill her in a very businesslike, fair manner- not to be petty, mean, or
childish.) I just think that Nikki deserves to be compensated for her time,
or in the very least, have her tablecloths returned and receive an apology!
Her consumable products (flowers) time, and and FEELINGS seem worth
the compensation- either via the original agreement or payment for
services rendered.
Am I way off on thinking this way? I feel that not doing anything wouldn't
really be taking the high road in this case, it would be allowing an unkind
and manipulative person encouragement to keep doing what she's doing!
I am interested in getting more points of view on this, in the event I am
ever faced with a similar situation.smileys/smiley5.gif
Thanks!
--Kitt
DREAM + BELIEVE = ACHIEVE!Edited by: CreativiTEA
UltraSkinPro
12-05-2005, 03:36 PM
I like the billing her idea, personally.
Can you even envision Martha Stewart, or worse yet, Donald Trump
putting up with her cr--well, YOU know what I mean.. NEVER HAPPEN!
I absolutely would have immeditely packed up all of my things (Flowers
and all), and just said "Jane, I am sorry for the confusion. I undestood
that if I gave you these flower arrangements for FREE, that I would be
compensated by being able to sell my product line here tday."
"Apparently, I was mistaken, so I will just ake my things and leave, but
thank you. This was a valuable learning experience".No anger, no
staking off in a huff, Just professional pleasant detachment.
USP
Can you even envision Martha Stewart, or worse yet, Donald Trump
putting up with her cr--well, YOU know what I mean.. NEVER HAPPEN!
I absolutely would have immeditely packed up all of my things (Flowers
and all), and just said "Jane, I am sorry for the confusion. I undestood
that if I gave you these flower arrangements for FREE, that I would be
compensated by being able to sell my product line here tday."
"Apparently, I was mistaken, so I will just ake my things and leave, but
thank you. This was a valuable learning experience".No anger, no
staking off in a huff, Just professional pleasant detachment.
USP
UltraSkinPro
12-05-2005, 03:49 PM
And furthermore...
I would have taken those lovely flower arrangements to an old folks home,
hospital, or the alliance against family violence. THAT would have made me
feel better!
I would love to have seen her party without your decorations or tablecloths!
What a hoot that would have been!
USP
I would have taken those lovely flower arrangements to an old folks home,
hospital, or the alliance against family violence. THAT would have made me
feel better!
I would love to have seen her party without your decorations or tablecloths!
What a hoot that would have been!
USP
UNcommonScents
12-05-2005, 04:00 PM
And furthermore...
I would have taken those lovely flower arrangements to an old folks
home,
hospital, or the alliance against family violence. THAT would have made
me
feel better!
I would love to have seen her party without your decorations or
tablecloths!
What a hoot that would have been!
USP
I LIKE the way you think, USP!smileys/smiley4.gif
--Kitt
I would have taken those lovely flower arrangements to an old folks
home,
hospital, or the alliance against family violence. THAT would have made
me
feel better!
I would love to have seen her party without your decorations or
tablecloths!
What a hoot that would have been!
USP
I LIKE the way you think, USP!smileys/smiley4.gif
--Kitt
UltraSkinPro
12-05-2005, 04:24 PM
Back at ya, Kitt!
USP
USP
tranquilityrose
12-05-2005, 06:41 PM
Hi Kitt,
I just think Nikki would be stirring up a huge wasps nest if she simply billed the woman without first speaking to her about the miscommunication. Nikki was placed in contact with this woman through her DD. I would hate to see her DD's relationship with the friend get tangled up in this.
Do I think Nikki should be compensated for her time and effort? Absolutely! I just think there is a better way to do it than blindly billing the woman. Perhaps a phone call or a note asking for the clean tableclothes would be a start. If she does not respond, then heck ya! Bill her! Boy,would Ilove to be a fly on the wall if it happens! smileys/smiley36.gif
I just think Nikki would be stirring up a huge wasps nest if she simply billed the woman without first speaking to her about the miscommunication. Nikki was placed in contact with this woman through her DD. I would hate to see her DD's relationship with the friend get tangled up in this.
Do I think Nikki should be compensated for her time and effort? Absolutely! I just think there is a better way to do it than blindly billing the woman. Perhaps a phone call or a note asking for the clean tableclothes would be a start. If she does not respond, then heck ya! Bill her! Boy,would Ilove to be a fly on the wall if it happens! smileys/smiley36.gif
UNcommonScents
12-05-2005, 06:50 PM
Aha! I may have missed something in my interpretation- I was under the
impression that her attempts at contacting this woman directly have not
been successful. I wholly agree that a personal attempt to resolve conflict
should always be the first step!
--Kitt
impression that her attempts at contacting this woman directly have not
been successful. I wholly agree that a personal attempt to resolve conflict
should always be the first step!
--Kitt
nlove
12-05-2005, 08:57 PM
Debbie... you said exactly what I "wished" I would have said! It's exactly what I was thinking but was just too floored to let it out of my mouth. She intentionally waited to tell me to leave after all was set up and ready to go and with guests already there because she knew I probably wouldn't say that then.
After long though on it since it's happened, I do agree with you (Cecilia and Rebecca) that I should just assume the booking and continue contact with her as such. I can only hope that those who came to the party will come to her home party as well.
I don't think you're being harsh Kitt. I wish I would stand up for myself more. I just let things roll off of me so much. I keep chalking them up as learning experiences but when am I going to learn?? I always try to see the good in people and unfortunately, it gets me burnt sometimessmileys/smiley18.gif
I love the idea about the bill too!! There's just no way I would go through with it.
She called tonight and left a message on the machine saying there was just a couple of things she needed to cover w/ me. I'm sure my tablecloths are one of them...lol.
I'm going to call her back tomorrow after errands and working and tell her my open Saturdays in February for her party. I'll post on what happens from there. I have a BIG feeling she is going to try to squirm out of the party. I do plan on telling her (very calmly and professionally) that I would not have brought my product there if I knew she did not want me to stay there with it. Thatwas the first time I have ever left my product anywhere and I only did so as to not cause her any embarrassment in front of her co-workers. I also want to tell her that by not being at the party, I was not able to answer any questions or comment on my products (which is what sells the products).... therefore, a party really is needed with her co-workers so that many of them can get to know me better and I can answer any questions they might have had but could not ask me since I wasn't there. How does that sound????
As for the centerpieces, I did take them to the restaurant where my hubbyworks at and gave them away to ladies who never get arrangements from their husbands and to some older, single ladies that work there. They all loved them! Anretirement home would have been better but there isn't one around that area and it was late when I dropped them off. Maybe next timesmileys/smiley2.gif I like to do $1 rose corsages for the ladies in the homes on Mother's Daysmileys/smiley1.gif
After long though on it since it's happened, I do agree with you (Cecilia and Rebecca) that I should just assume the booking and continue contact with her as such. I can only hope that those who came to the party will come to her home party as well.
I don't think you're being harsh Kitt. I wish I would stand up for myself more. I just let things roll off of me so much. I keep chalking them up as learning experiences but when am I going to learn?? I always try to see the good in people and unfortunately, it gets me burnt sometimessmileys/smiley18.gif
I love the idea about the bill too!! There's just no way I would go through with it.
She called tonight and left a message on the machine saying there was just a couple of things she needed to cover w/ me. I'm sure my tablecloths are one of them...lol.
I'm going to call her back tomorrow after errands and working and tell her my open Saturdays in February for her party. I'll post on what happens from there. I have a BIG feeling she is going to try to squirm out of the party. I do plan on telling her (very calmly and professionally) that I would not have brought my product there if I knew she did not want me to stay there with it. Thatwas the first time I have ever left my product anywhere and I only did so as to not cause her any embarrassment in front of her co-workers. I also want to tell her that by not being at the party, I was not able to answer any questions or comment on my products (which is what sells the products).... therefore, a party really is needed with her co-workers so that many of them can get to know me better and I can answer any questions they might have had but could not ask me since I wasn't there. How does that sound????
As for the centerpieces, I did take them to the restaurant where my hubbyworks at and gave them away to ladies who never get arrangements from their husbands and to some older, single ladies that work there. They all loved them! Anretirement home would have been better but there isn't one around that area and it was late when I dropped them off. Maybe next timesmileys/smiley2.gif I like to do $1 rose corsages for the ladies in the homes on Mother's Daysmileys/smiley1.gif
IamBlessed
12-05-2005, 09:27 PM
Nikki, you are going to be fine. I feel used and taken advantage of alot as well. Not just in business but in day to day life. But I just have to stop and say, "you know what? I can't change what just happened and Lord, I give it to you to take care of"
I noticed ladies mentioned karma here. Of course, me being a Christian I don't believe in karma for a second or luck. Everything happens for a reason and blessings come out of it all, wether the initial event was bad or good. Someone else said that this lady may have taken an awesome opinion of you away and be referring people to you left and right. It is not for us to say why or how something happens but to take it, try and find some good in it and go on.
You were out money on this so I would definitely try and get back your expenses either in cash or by letting her know that you got zero sales because for some reason you weren't allowed to stay with your products so she either needs to pay you for the labor and supplies or hold a party for you on such and such date. There is a nice way to word that, I just don't know how off the top of my head,lol.
No, we shouldn't let people run over us. But sometimes, things happen and I agree with what Debbie said. Do what you need to do to recoup your losses and then let it go because it'll end up making you more and more angry and that will carry over into your future business contacts, wether you realize it or not. Mainly because you won't trust as easily.
I say that because I am going through some things with a company that I am DESPERATELY trying to leave but for some reason they can't get their crap together and get my shows shipped out. I am so angry at them and am so tempted to try and sue for everything I can get a lawyer to find that I can sue them for. But, I keep myself from making that call because I know that in time, the Lord will take care of them and the nastiness that they are doing to me and my customers and I trust He will make it better vengeance than I could ever reap on them myself. And, it is also keeping me from giving my normal 200% to my new Discovery Toys business because until every piece of clothing is delivered and every customers refund is taken care of, I can't close that door.
But you can. Do whatever suits your personality best to get your money back for this event and then shut the door on it. There will be a blessing in this for you because of your good heartedness to her and all the other people you've done things for. So, just take comfort in that. It may take a day or it may take a year, but you will be blessed through this somehow.
Take care and God Bless!!!!
I noticed ladies mentioned karma here. Of course, me being a Christian I don't believe in karma for a second or luck. Everything happens for a reason and blessings come out of it all, wether the initial event was bad or good. Someone else said that this lady may have taken an awesome opinion of you away and be referring people to you left and right. It is not for us to say why or how something happens but to take it, try and find some good in it and go on.
You were out money on this so I would definitely try and get back your expenses either in cash or by letting her know that you got zero sales because for some reason you weren't allowed to stay with your products so she either needs to pay you for the labor and supplies or hold a party for you on such and such date. There is a nice way to word that, I just don't know how off the top of my head,lol.
No, we shouldn't let people run over us. But sometimes, things happen and I agree with what Debbie said. Do what you need to do to recoup your losses and then let it go because it'll end up making you more and more angry and that will carry over into your future business contacts, wether you realize it or not. Mainly because you won't trust as easily.
I say that because I am going through some things with a company that I am DESPERATELY trying to leave but for some reason they can't get their crap together and get my shows shipped out. I am so angry at them and am so tempted to try and sue for everything I can get a lawyer to find that I can sue them for. But, I keep myself from making that call because I know that in time, the Lord will take care of them and the nastiness that they are doing to me and my customers and I trust He will make it better vengeance than I could ever reap on them myself. And, it is also keeping me from giving my normal 200% to my new Discovery Toys business because until every piece of clothing is delivered and every customers refund is taken care of, I can't close that door.
But you can. Do whatever suits your personality best to get your money back for this event and then shut the door on it. There will be a blessing in this for you because of your good heartedness to her and all the other people you've done things for. So, just take comfort in that. It may take a day or it may take a year, but you will be blessed through this somehow.
Take care and God Bless!!!!
ccarroll
12-05-2005, 11:31 PM
I am speachless at the gall that woman had..... I hope she is VERY Embarassed. I must be kinda nieve, because I cannot concieve that someone would have the XXX to actually Do something like that! OMG
Stick it to her.... At the very least, I would definately bill her for the arrangements as you are out that money. Personally,I don't think I could stand being in the same room with her to do a party, so more power to ya!
Chris
Stick it to her.... At the very least, I would definately bill her for the arrangements as you are out that money. Personally,I don't think I could stand being in the same room with her to do a party, so more power to ya!
Chris
UNcommonScents
12-06-2005, 04:49 AM
Nikki,
You sound like a really great person- smileys/smiley31.gif
I sure hope your conversation with her today turns out to be a pleasant
surprise, and that the two of you are able to work something out that
leaves you feeling compensated and comfortable. I think your gesture for
the ladies at the restaurant was SO AWESOME! I hope you'll let us know
how things turn out for you.
On to BIGGER and BETTER things! smileys/smiley36.gif
--Kitt
DREAM + BELIEVE = ACHIEVE!Edited by: CreativiTEA
You sound like a really great person- smileys/smiley31.gif
I sure hope your conversation with her today turns out to be a pleasant
surprise, and that the two of you are able to work something out that
leaves you feeling compensated and comfortable. I think your gesture for
the ladies at the restaurant was SO AWESOME! I hope you'll let us know
how things turn out for you.
On to BIGGER and BETTER things! smileys/smiley36.gif
--Kitt
DREAM + BELIEVE = ACHIEVE!Edited by: CreativiTEA
mom4christ123
12-06-2005, 05:49 AM
I think your plan for your conversation with her is very good. And honestly, we have no idea what was going through her head either. I think you are handling it professionally and also in a way that lets her know how you feel without getting personal. Your DD's relationship with her friend should not be harmed because of this and also your business nor your peace of mind. I am so glad you stepped back and let yourself calm down before deciding what to do... I have definitely learned something from you. You are handling this with class.
nlove
12-06-2005, 07:28 AM
Thanks guyssmileys/smiley31.gif As my 5 yo and 2yo would say, "You're the Best!"
TMartin
12-06-2005, 11:15 AM
I think I would say..." I have to tell you, and I amlittle flabbergasted at how x day turned out, maybe you can shed some light on it for me. I was under impression from our prior conversations that I was offering my services, setting up and helping to decorate and in return would be able to stay for the day and talk about my wares wtih people. After I did the work I promised, I felt that you dismissed me and did not hold up your end of the bargain. I feel very hurt and frustrated over this. I want tobelieve you are a better business woman than that, so instead of assuming you had a motive, I think it easier for both of us to give you a chance to explain".
Wordy, but to the point. Sorry this happened! I hate situationslike that!!
Wordy, but to the point. Sorry this happened! I hate situationslike that!!
nlove
12-07-2005, 09:52 PM
I still haven't called her back yet. I've been too busy working and trying to get Christmas decorations and tree up.
Maybe tomorrowsmileys/smiley2.gif
Maybe tomorrowsmileys/smiley2.gif
