Fathers and Small Things
by Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC
I was packed and ready to leave for my two day
trip. My mind had been consumed with work and with many of the small
details of getting ready to go.
As I got into the car to leave, my thoughts turned
to my children. I’d been preoccupied for the last few days, and now
I’d be gone for a few more.
How to stay in touch with your kids during busy times
is often a father’s dilemma. Men tend to focus on one thing extremely
well for long periods, but this can lead to trouble. Shifting from
work to your family life isn’t always the easiest thing to do. And
if you don’t show your kids that you’re thinking about them, they
may assume that you’re not.
As I started down the road, I suddenly stopped the
car and turned around.
I drove back to my house, found a couple of cards,
and wrote a short message to each of my children. I put each in a
“secret” place where I knew they’d find it.
When I called the next night, it was clear that they’d
received the cards. “Daddy, I got your card,” they both blurted excitedly.
”When did you do that?”
My heart was warmed to hear this. It was such a small
thing. But it had a big impact on my kids. It was their “proof” that
I was thinking about them. And it was encouragement for me to continue
to do the small things that have a big impact.
Here are some ideas for fathers to show your kids
that you’re thinking of them.
• Call them to say hi when you’re at work. It doesn’t
have to be more than two minutes a week, and they’ll notice your efforts.
• Leave special messages for them around the house
when you’re not there. This lets them know that they’re in your thoughts,
even when you’re not there.
• When you’re out of town, call your kids and keep
them up to date on what you’re doing. This helps your kids to feel
involved in your life.
• Surprise your kids by showing up at an event where
you weren’t expected. This shows them that they’re high on your priority
list.
• Make sure you tell your kids that you’re thinking
of them when you’re away from them. Tell them that you think of them
when you’re at work. They may not realize this until you tell them.
As fathers get busier and work longer hours, the
little things can sometimes be lost. Don’t lose the opportunity to
show your kids how important
they are.
Take a moment to do the small things for your kids.
It won’t seem small to them.
Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC, coaches men to be better
fathers and husbands. He is the author of “25 Secrets of Emotionally
Intelligent Fathers” http://www.markbrandenburg.com/father.htm
Sign up for his FREE bi-weekly newsletter, “Dads, Don’t Fix Your
Kids,” at http://www.markbrandenburg.com.
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